oh yeah the amount of incorrect quotes i do in a part are completely randomized bc idk
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Remus: Are you the SAT because I'd do you for three hours and forty five minutes
Remus: with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks
Logan: That's the most reasonable pick up line I've ever heard. You're hired.
Logan: The fact that we can accidentally bite the insides of our cheeks has to be the biggest design flaw of the human body.
Virgil: NO ITS THE FACT THAT OUR TRACHEA AND ESOPHAGUS CROSS BRIEFLY OCCUPY THE SAME HOLE- DOLPHINS DONT HAVE THIS PROBLEM
Logan: WE ONLY GET ONE SET OF ADULT TEETH THAT ARE DESIGNED TO LAST MAYBE HALF OF OUR EXPECTED LIFESPAN
Virgil: OUR LOWER BACKS ARE STRUCTURALLY **FUCKED** FROM MAKING A SHITTY TRANSITION TO BEING BIPEDS
Logan: INTELLIGENT DESIGN MY ASS, BUT AT THE VERY LEAST WE'RE NOT HORSES
Remus,: in conclusion, the humans were extremely angry until they saw the horse, and then thought, 'WELL, THAT BASTARD'S GOT IT ROUGH'
Remus, to Janus: If I were a student at Hogwarts, I'd use Howlers to send nice messages to people.
Janus, internally: theresatwisttheresatwist
Remus: So you'd be sitting there in the Great Hall, eating breakfast when an owl drops a Howler in front of you. You, and everyone else at your table, just stares at it as it trembles, explodes open, shrieks I WANT TO TOUCH YOUR SWEET BUTT and then dissolves into flames.
Janus, speedwalking away: I'M SO DONE.
Roman: To draw or to write, that is the question.
Roman: trick question, the answer is ALWAYS Minecraft
Logan: Based on genital structure, men should really be the ones wearing skirts and women should be wearing pants.
Remus: The Scots were right all along-
Logan: The Scots did it to hide more knives on their bodies.
Remus: THE SCOTS WERE RIGHT ALL ALONG!
Logan, stumbling around blindly: Have any of y'all seen my glasses?
Roman: Yes, I have.
Roman: Unlike you.
Logan: Because my eyes work just fine.
Remus: I'll give you $300 for you to ask out your crush
Virgil: I'll give you $500 for you to ask out your worst enemy
Roman: $800 cash that's a hell of a deal
Roman: Do ya want ta' know your gay name?
Virgil: My... gay name?
Roman: Yeah, it's your first name-
Virgil: Ha hA, very funny.
Roman, on one knee: -and my last name.
Virgil: Oh my God-
**KaC!AU**
Logan: Aren't stars so amazing?
Remus, quietly: You're the prettiest star...
Logan: What'd you say?
Remus: I SAID I WANT TO HIT YOU WITH A CAR
**KaC!AU**
Remy: I love you
Remy: I've always loved you
Remy: You're just so beautiful
Remy: Fuck me please
Remy: Your Adonis features that make me melt
Emile, taking out his earbuds: Were you saying something?
Remy: Nevermind.
Emile: okay
Virgil: The others assume I'm silent in their presence because I'm in awe.
Virgil: I just rather not waste my energy reasoning with them.
Patton: Well, screw me if I'm wrong but-
Janus: You're wrong.
Patton: What I wasn't even done-
Janus: **You. Are. Wrong.**
Janus: Now REEE-, what do we always say?
Remus: Be gay, do crime.
Janus: No.
Roman: YES.
Remus, looking around: How strange, I can't find it.
Patton: What?
Remus: Your straightness.
Remus: Arrest me, daddy.
