Frozen Underwater

They Lied

I yawned as i walked down the hall almost bumping into the wall. i walked in the kitchen looking for the light switch i turn the breakfast bar lights on. they were dim and the apartment was cold and quiet i went to the fridge and grabbed the water gallon. put it down and grabbed a cup. 

this apartment is cozy but it feels lonely, even though my brother is sleeping on his room and my mom is sleeping on her room  this is a three bedroom apartment small kitchen next to a small table a breakfast bar with no chairs to sit in the living room has no t.v one couch of the color red there's a chair next to a window, it was still dark outside but its right next to the high way I'm always impress of how many cars pass by at this time.

I looked over at the stove and check the time, its 5:08 a.m.  wow time flies so slow for me i took my cup and  poor water ..... I stare out the window while i pour the water in the cup i just start to drift of........

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 (speaking Spanish)

"when are you coming back........ i miss you!" i said with a sad tone. I was staying at my grandparents house from my dads side of the family, mean while my mom went to Connecticut to take care of my great-grandma also from the same side of my dads family. 

"soon very soon..." she said "you know i came here to take care of your great grandmother who was not feeling very well and needed someone to watch over her." 

"i know but i miss you..... " i cupped the phone close to my mouth for no one to here what i was about to say especially my grandmother who was sitting close by watching t.v. "....... and you know how she scolds me and tells me what to do, and order people around" i said to her and all i heard was laughter on the phone." hey don't be mean to her, she is your grandmother you know !!" she said as i heard her exhale , like she does when she smokes a cigarette. 

i don't really like that she smokes but its not like i hate it when she does it. To be honest i like to watch her smoke in the balcony, back in our house. she looks calm and happy. On the other hand i prefer my mother then my grandmother, always bossing me around telling me how to be more lady like and feminine. But she doesn't understand the trouble of having three other brothers and no sister. its not my fault that I'm always around boys. don't blame me i was a 7 year old kid.

"yeah i know..." i said with a smile. "well honey i have to go ....." she said." okay talked to you soon.... " i said.

"i love you" she said.

"i love you more!" i said.

"i love you higher then the skies. "

"i love you to the infinity and higher then the skies and stars up up up high!" i said with a smile, and also tea-ping toeing up. like if i could reach the skies.

and with that we were sending kisses through the phone and said are finals goodbye and we hang up the phone. and with that i walked out of the room and into the playroom. 

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(speaking English)

I was brought back by  the water on my feet it was cold and it woke me up from my daze. "shit " i said as i put the gallon down and sip the top of my cup so the water would stop falling. i put the gallon back to the fridge and then got a mop to clean up the mess that i had made.  when i was done i put everything back drank my cup of water then rinse it on the sink. i check the time on the stove clock it said 5:28 a.m. " ohhhhh nooo...." i ran to my room to got any clothes ......... sweats and a black shirt seem fine i layed it on my bed grabbing a towel and going to my moms bathroom turn on the shower and took a three minute shower.

when i was done i brushed my teeth and ran back to my room and change. i put on my shoes by then i checked the time and it said 5:48 a.m. i got ready faster then expected know i was just getting my backpack ready. The reason i woke up early was to do some homework that i didn't feel like doing yesterday. but i guess i can leave it for first period. 

i got everything ready before i left i grabbed a jacket and knocked on my brothers door. to see if he wakes up to go to school, this is getting old he is a senior he should be waking up all by himself know.

i am a sophomore and i get up early he should do the same. I went downstairs to open the door but before i left i said "I'm leaving! to school" to my mom who was on her bed. i opened and closed the door it was know 6:14 a.m . and the bus comes at the stop at 6:30. i waited for my friend to come out she lived under me well next to my apartment but i live upstairs and she lives downstairs.

And for the first time in months. I was on time. 

-

(speaking Spanish)

"what do you mean? going on a trip.." my grandmother was telling me. that we were going to go to a trip on the united states to go to a park of some sort i think it was called Disney land. my grandparents were rich i mean really they live the good life. have a mansion, maids , and a piano on the second floor that i enjoyed very much looking at it.  but not playing it. 

but this trip didn't sit right with me, my mom got back from Connecticut just when i almost turned 8. i was back at my grandparents house because that's something we do every weekend and i also get to see my other brothers. 

The whole thing didn't sit right with me. but my brother on the other hand said "yes" without even thinking much. as my grandmother smiled at his reaction i still didn't want to go. i was afraid of been apart from my mother. so i protested " i want to go back home to my mom " i said. my grandma gave me a cold stare for a few seconds. it was obvious that i wasn't the favorite grandchild of the family. that would have to be for my brother Emmanuel was the favorite because he was the first born. the first grandchild and i was the third.

the fact that i was born as a girl didn't sit right with the rest of my dads side of the family. they wanted boys for some sort of reason.

and my dad got marry to another women right before i was born. so im just their in the air, a family that only wanted boys. and every time i did something 'boy like' as my grandmother put it i got scold and yelled telling me to be more lady like.

to all this i rather be close to my moms then my dads side of the family. 

when we went back home to my house the one my mother had been waiting outside for our return. i told her everything that my grandma said about the 'trip to the united states'. But to my surprise my mom said that grandma told her already. she told me it would be for a couple of months and then we will be back. so then i agreed to the trip because she said it was okay and that i would be back. so i went on this 'trip'. and to my surprise. few days later was airport day and we went on the plane and took off me  saying goodbye to my mom more then ten times.

when we got there it was a house that we were staying and in that house lived my dad with his new wife and step-son in florida. and i wasn't ready for the other news...... the one that they told me, the one that they said i cant go back home and that i have to stay and live with my father and step-mother.

At first i thought it was a visit the time of the year were it snows and gets cold. But they lied. no Disney land, no snow..... which that, i thought it happen everywhere in the u.s.a. but guessed wrong. and worst of all . i cant go back home, to my dear mother. 

they lied

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The door to my friends apartment was about to open. and that brought me back to earth.