foreword + A/N

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"THE HIDDEN PARASITE TURNS MY HEART INSIDE OUT."

 You have been destined to die from the beginning

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You have been destined to die from the beginning. Through you does she slip, like sunlight through a sieve, settling onto the ruins of future human relationships, thereby destroying any chance of existence. Dead before birth. Despite the throbbing cancer of this unhealthy dependence, it was not wrong; it just was.

That time, when mom passes away, she births you a second you: An Ability. What cannot be changed can, and should, be broken.

This is why she has decided on breaking you from the inside.

This grief is my power. This grief is who I am. Thus, I return to the lonely womb, killed from grief that once blessed me a life.

Mother, mom, ma, I'm a good girl. Please stay dead inside of me.

Just like we grow intimate with the most disturbing of things, I shall live with you.

Mother, mom, ma, stay with me.

"JUST DIE, YOU HIDDEN INSECT."

A/N

Hello everyone!

First off, I'd like to preface that this story will be an FYODOR X READER X DAZAI piece. I hadn't gotten the space to fit that into the necessary details. I don't think it matters that much, especially since it will focus more on the dynamic between Fyodor and the reader.

This was supposed to be a one-shot for "Creator&Creation", but as I kept writing and editing it, it amassed to over 4000 words. And that 4K words made up 1/5 of the storyline. I decided to just publish a separate book for it to get it out of the way.

As per usual, would it really be a trademark JUDAS book if there was no blood, no gore? The trigger warnings are as followed: explicit details of death(suicide), parental issues(not abusive), depression, mentions of blood, animal death, violence in general, questionable coping mechanisms.

This is the first time I've properly written something for Fyodor, so please excuse me if he seems OOC at times.

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