[REWRITTEN] send tweet? | drarry twitter au

xxvii

📴 offline – hermione's p.o.v.

Thanks, Pansy.  For breaking me; isn't that a line from Sinead O'Connor? I never understood it before. It used to sound like permission, albeit retroactive, to hurt someone. I get it now. Only a lover can wound so deep, cut to the very core. That level of hurt has to be an inside job, I suppose. You broke me and watched me bleed.  I really appreciate it.

I keep bumping into Draco, too.  It doesn't help at all.  I saw him at the coffee shop with his mother, then at the park with Harry... Harry.  It hurt.  Why did Draco get a happy ending and I didn't? This was unfair! Every time he opened his mouth I got angrier. "Hermione, hey! I'm sorry about what happened... " At first I would swallow my retort and just do it, smile and move on. But that only made it worse.  Then, I saw him by himself.  He was walking down the sidewalk casually and I just snapped. He was so relaxed, I wanted that!  All that rage came out faster than magma and just as destructive. It consumed all that he was, so delicate under that carefully ordered world.

At first I felt guilt, an attempt to stop, but soon I gave way, realizing how much I enjoyed beating my fists into his skin.  It was almost therapeutic.  With every hit I felt a cold zing of delight, a buzz I could get no other way.  At first Draco seemed confused, but he just feel into it.

It seemed like he didn't want to fight back.  Was he scared of hurting me? I was already hurt enough!

He raised his hands above his head as some kind of defense eventually, and that just seemed to make me even more angry.  That's when I noticed Harry turning the corner and I immediately turned back to my usual self.  Like a pin dropped.

"Oh... Oh my Merlin! Draco, I'm so sorry! I don't know wh -- "

Harry crouched down beside him, checking him for bleeding or bruises.  It hurt even more to see my best friend so panicked.  He muttered sweet words to him, helping him stand up carefully.  All I did was stand there and watch.  I was a monster.

Harry barely looked at me, too preoccupied with caring for Draco to may me any mind.  I was kind of thankful for that.  I knew if he even glanced in my direction I would be torn apart.  I watched him glare at me, before turning away and leading Draco else where.  The guilt was like gasoline in my guts. My insides died slowly in the toxicity, needing no more than a spark to set it ablaze. The fire burnt me out so badly there was nothing left but a shell, an outline of a person.

–––

💌 messages

lightning justharryy
What the fuck is wrong with you?

mione mo hermionex
Harry, I'm really sorry.

lightning justharryy
You think that makes up for it? Draco was nothing but kind to you and you treated him like shit.

lightning justharryy
You're such a selfish bitch.  You did that for your own pleasure, didn't you?  I could tell.

mione mo hermionex
He's friends with her.

lightning justharryy
So what?

lightning justharryy
I'm friends with Pansy as well! Punch me!

mione mo hermionex
You're a lot stronger than he is...

lightning justharryy
Fine then.  I'll get you back, you dirty bitch

mione mo hermionex
Harry...
seen

–––

timeline

lightning justharryy
To those wondering, Draco is fine.
6:58 PM · September 29, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone