Rose

Chapter Four

Rose refreshed the drinks for her and Josh.  Josh took out another joint and though Rose shook her head, Josh lit up and inhaled deeply.

"Don't get too stoned or you won't remember what I tell you.  And it's not all that interesting anyway."

"Uh-huh, you don't get out of it that easy.  Now tell."

"Well, up until I was five my dad was alive and we were a normal family.  I adored my dad.  He always made time for me and we had some intense conversations.  I know that sounds crazy, intense conversations with a five-year-old, but it's true.  Dad would always explain things so I could understand them.  When he died suddenly, Mom and I nearly died with him."

"How did he die?" asked Josh.

"Illness.  The doctors couldn't tell us the exact cause of his death, and to this day we don't know.  Anyway, Mom was at loose ends and she seemed to forget about me.  It was like every once in a while she'd realize she had a daughter.  I spent most of my time with sitters and neighbors and the older kids.  Since I tended to run small, I always looked younger than my age."

"And then?" 

"Steve came.  Steve Abercrombie.  He married my mother when I was seven, almost eight.  He wanted me to call him 'Daddy' and do creepy stuff like sit on his lap and all.  This for an eight-year-old.  I just got a bad vibe from him altogether.  Usually, I could avoid him but there were times I couldn't."

"Did he molest you?" asked Josh, the joint forgotten for the moment.

"He tried, but I was always too fast or Mom was around or someone else was.  Then around ten, my whole world changed.  I went to bed one night and it seemed when I woke up, I had breasts.  Then I got my period.  Yeah, year ten was just a banner year for me."

Josh blushed slightly at the mention of Rose's period, but it didn't bother Rose in the slightest.

Rose continued.  "I just got bigger in the chest and I read everything I could get my hands on about the changes a woman's body goes through, so when Mom finally got around to 'the talk', I knew more than she did.  And she's a nurse."

Rose took another drink of tequila.  

"Meanwhile, I was getting curves.  And the boys finally noticed me, even if they called me 'Rose the Runt'.  Someone always wanted to be my boyfriend.  What they really wanted, I'm sure you know, being male and all."

"Hey, don't lump me in with all those guys.  I'm really harmless."

"Sorry, you do seem different, but one can only judge from one's own experience."

"You have a point..."

Rose cut him off.  "Let me finish.  At thirteen, I took a really menial job sweeping and cleaning a notion's shop.  And that's where I started to get really good at sewing.  Mrs. Clark paid me under the table so we never worried about taxes or deductions or any of that.  But I couldn't work just there.  I had a plan."

"To run off and become a groupie?"

"I never said it was a good plan.  Anyway, I took another job at Mike's Sandwich Shop and lied about my age.  I had all the papers to prove it.  So, I worked two jobs and saved all my money, every penny, and I quit high school and worked full-time for Mike.  I still worked the notion's shop and my savings were growing.  Not by much, but they were growing."

Rose took a break from her narrative to go to the ladies' room and she expected Josh to be asleep when she got back, but he was waiting for her with rapt attention.

"Years thirteen to seventeen, this year, were the worst.  I had to avoid Steve at home and my male customers at the diner, and it just seemed I was a freak magnet, you know?  Then Steve came home drunk one night, in fact, it's been less than a week, and my mom had to work a graveyard shift at the hospital.  So, Steve decides he's waited long enough and he tried to rape me.  He grabbed me and I went into defensive mode.  I kicked him between his legs, dug four furrows in his cheek, and hit him with a lamp.  I made sure he was still breathing, and then I left."