The Boy Next Door

forty two

AMELIAS POV
I was sitting alone in my room staring at the wall. I heard my door creak open and I looked over my shoulder and it was Owen.
"I can't talk to you," I said.
"Okay," he said, "can I sit?" I froze and looked at him, he looked so worried and I felt so bad.
"Yeah," I said.
"Okay," he said softly and sat down next to me. We were both quiet for a long time, we must have been sitting there, side by side, staring at my wall silently for at least an hour. I decided to break the silence.
"He texted me," I said quietly.
"Who?" He said.
"Ryan," I said, "he uh, he texted me last night while I was asleep, and, he told me all this stuff, and it was a goodbye, it was his goodbye, and I could have stopped him if I was awake."
"Amelia," he sighed, "Amelia this isn't your fault."
"I could have stopped him," I said, feeling my eyes fill with tears, "his mom called me this morning that he was dead."
"I'm sorry," he said.
"It's my fault," I said.
"It's not your fault," he said.
"I was mean to him," I said, "I called him annoying everyday and all he wanted to be was my friend, he wanted to be my best friend, I should have let him."
"Amelia," he sighed.
"You should go," I said.
"Amelia," he said.
"No please," I said, "I want to be alone please." My voice broke and my lip was trembling.
"Okay," he nodded, "okay I'll go."
"Owen?" I said.
"Yeah?" He said.
"I love you," I said.
"I love you too," he said and got up.
"I'll see you later," I said, fighting my tears.
"I'll see you later," he said and ran back downstairs. I couldn't stop the tears. I started sobbing uncontrollably. It was my fault. I could have stopped him from doing this.
"Amelia," my mom said.
"M-mom," I cried.
"Baby girl what happened?" My mom said and came over to me.
"No," I said crying, "don't."
"Can I give you a hug?" She asked, I could tell how worried she was and I felt awful about it. I nodded and she sat down next to me and brought me into her arms. I cried into her while she held me and rubbed my back.
"Talk to me," she begged. I got up and grabbed my phone and pulled up Ryan's message. I gave it to her and sat down. She put my phone down and looked at me.
"Amelia honey, this isn't your fault," she said.
"If," I started crying, "if I was awake I could have stopped him."
"No, stop, this isn't your fault," my mom said.
"He loved me so much," I said, "and I was so mean to him, I called him annoying everyday, I blew him off, I wouldn't even go on one date with him."
"Amelia," my mom said.
"And he killed himself," I said. She wrapped her arms around me and we sat there for a while.
"They don't, they don't know if he killed himself," my mom said.
"He did drugs all the time wouldn't he know what would kill him? He told me what would," I said.
"Honey," my mom said, "you can't put this on yourself."
CAROLYNS POV
I was worried sick about Amelia. She shuts everyone out, I'm surprised she even told me why she was upset. I was scared she was going to do something. I walked by her room to check on her and she was sitting in the middle of her room staring at the wall. I was worried, she got like this before she tried to kill herself.
"Are you hungry?" I asked.
"No," she said quietly.
"What if I bring you something? You could eat it later," I said.
"If it makes you sleep at night sure," she said. I sighed and walked downstairs and made her a sandwich and put the plate on her desk. She didn't even look up.
"Thank you," she said.
"You're welcome," I said.
"Can I be left alone? I'm not going to fucking kill myself I know that doesn't work," she said.
"Amelia," I sighed, "please just eat something."
"I'm not hungry," she mumbled, and I was afraid she would stop eating again.
"Okay," I nodded. I walked downstairs and looked at my phone and I had a text message from Evelyn.
"How is she?" It read.
"Not Good, I'm super worried," I sent.
"I'm so sorry," she sent.
"I'm just hoping tomorrow is better for her," I sent. And I meant it. She can't fall down this hole again, last time she did she dumped Owen. I don't even know how I'll sleep tonight worrying about her. I heard footsteps and she came down and put the plate on the counter and walked upstairs. She ate a few bites of it but at least she ate some of it. I sighed and put it in a ziplock bag in case she wanted the rest later, it was going to be hard for her to come back from this.