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n e way i think my d*d is dying
like his skin is yellow and idk if i told y'all this but when quarantine first started, he was hallucinating (audio and visual). not to mention he doesn't eat anything anymore but is constantly violently shitting his brains out (this is tmi ik but i :/. you can from room which is on the other end of the hallway). not to mention he smells absolutely awful. idk what it is like improper hygiene but it's repulsive
all he does is sleep, drink and eat so i wouldn't be surprised. he doesn't leave the house anymore and he has no hobbies or friends. my immediate family cannot stand him and all my nieces and nephews are scared of him. and some part of me feels pity because it seems so lonely and awful to know you don't have much time left (me not fantasizing about death anymore 🤩). but he is doing it to himself.
like its sad because he is my dad (🤢🤮) and im watching wither in front of my eyes but then i remember all of the shit that he did so i feel justice is being served(is that sadistic). his alcoholism and just personality in general has left a lot of scars in my family and now his drinking is finally harming him. it's probably not that deep lmao
this was just so i could cathart (idk if that is a real word) and it feels nice to get it off my chest. idk how im feeling. numb is only word i feel fits but im not really numb ya know. one day i will probably breakdown over it 😔☝🏻
