Advice

How to recognize a toxic friend

Today's word is filled with self love. And getting rid of those referred to as toxic. Though sometimes when you have been friends with someone for so long it is hard to see if they are toxic or not. So here are some tale tell signs.

1.) Their values are always more important than yours.
➪Friendship is a relationship where it is give and take. If they constantly put you of the back burner for others or themself they maybe toxic

⌫ My personal experience a friend and I had taken some pictures of each other for senior year. We wanted to take more when the weather turned cooler and the leaves started to change colors. Well in the time we were waiting she made up with her other best friend and got a boyfriend. So when it became fall I asked her several times when we were going to go. Every time she told me that she would have to check with her friend and boyfriend first to see if they wanted her to take their pictures and then she would let me know. But she never let me know even though we made the plans before her friend and boyfriend made plans. Then I got my hair dyed and went to take them with my mom. She found out and got mad and stopped talking to me.
      

2.) They make you will like a burden.
➪ Friends help each other and don't always get paid back. If it is just one person doing all the giving or if they make you feel back for not giving they maybe toxic.

⌫ My personal experience  My friend had a truck while I didn't have a car. So I depended on her to take me places when my mom couldn't. Most of the time it was something she invited me to or we were going together. I always paid for our food. And when we didn't eat I almost always gave her a little money for gas. But she nevertheless complained about her never having gas money and me riding with her. She either made subtle comments or talked behind my back.

3.) They dampen the mood.
➪ The joy of friendship is filled with laughter but if you fill a constant weight on your shoulders from gossip or self pity it isn't a good friendship.

⌫ My personal experience My friend came from a divorced household (same) but her parents hated each other. She had some trouble with her stepdad leading her into a depression. As a friend I was there to listen to her. But eventually it was a way for her to get attention. She started to tell (what I consider to be personal information) to everyone. She started drama and spread rumors about people that she didn't get along with.

4.) They are jealous
➪ Pretty much explains itself

⌫ My personal Experience I started to become friends with my friends ex (she was friends with him too) but as we got close she started to talk bad about him and try to separate us. At first I thought it was a joke but then it got annoying so me and the ex started to ignore her when she was like that. Well then she got a boyfriend (who I knew longer than she did) but I got a dirty look everytime I talked to him. He tried to high five me once and she slapped his hand away. I had no interest in her boyfriend and was kind of insulted that she didn't trust me around him.

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Have you had to drop a friend recently?

What other topics would you like me to discuss?

Are there any traits I left out?

I love to hear form you!