13 Reasons From My Best Friend

Chapter 13- Porter

One last try. I'm giving life one last try. I recorded 12 tapes. I started with Justin. Then Jessica. Who each broke my heart. Alex, Tyler, Courtney, Marcus, who each helped destroy my reputation. On through Zach and Ryan... who broke my spirit. Through tape number 12...Bryce Walker...who broke my soul. But a funny thing happened as I finished number 12. I felt something... shift. I had poured it all out... and for a minute... just a minute... I felt like maybe I could beat this. I decided to give life one more chance. But this time, I was asking for help... because I know I can't do it alone. I know that now.

Of course, if you're listening to this, I failed. Or he failed, and my fate is sealed.

--

I snuck into Clay's room to see Tony and Clay. I turned to my brother and scrunched my face up, "Hey, what the fuck happened to your face?" I asked, "I'll show you." Clay says excited, "This couldn't wait till after school?" Tony asks and Clay holds a tape up

"Copy this tape. I'll get it from you after homeroom." Clay says, "I already have copies." Tony says, "No. Remember how side "B" was blank?" Clay asked , "Yeah."

"It's not blank anymore." Clay says and presses play. Bryce's voice echos, "She wanted me. Me. She was practically begging me to fuck her. If that's rape, then every girl at this school wants to be raped."

"He fucking confessed." I said "No. You didn't give him the tapes, did you?" I asked, "I gave him the gist of his." Clay says and hands it to Tony, "I'm assuming you want to make a copy of that to keep your set complete."

"And then what?" Tony asks, "Uh..Sheri texted me last night. She went to the police herself." I told them. "What happened?" Tony asked, "I don't know. But if she's facing up to it, and we have Bryce's confession..." I say and Tony cuts me off, "What about going through the cycle like Hannah wanted?"

"It's time we stop thinking about what Hannah wanted and start thinking about what she needs." I snapped, "And Jessica. And every other girl who "practically begged" Bryce to fuck her."

"I gotta tell you, Clay, I am not sure that this
is the right thing to do, and even if I was, I don't know where we stand. We can't be righteous."

"We've been sitting on evidence for weeks. I dont know about you guys but I'm tired of lying." I told them, "Either we do something now, or we give it up tomorrow in that deposition." Tony then turned to me, "There are half a dozen kids going in there today. Who knows what happens with them."

"Tony, This tape... This tape blows up the world. Which is what we should do, don't you think?" I asked, "Clay? You in?"

"Yeah, I'm in."

--

A few days after I recorded tape 12, I saw Bryce in the hallway. I thought I could never show my face at that school again. Everything was dark for days. But then... just a little flash of light. A flash of light, and you think, maybe... I feel like, as a society, our priorities are all out of whack, you know?

--

I cleared my throat as I shakenly walked up to the door and knocked. Mr. Porter opened the door and let me in.

"Clari" He says and I stood there, "What happened? Are you all right?" He asked, "Yeah, no, I'm fine. It's just...I needed to talk. Is that okay?" I asked, "Yeah, sure. Come on. So, uh... what's on your heart today?"

"Well, uh... just everything, I guess." I started off, "Okay, every... everything, huh? Everything is a lot. Why don't we start with
how you're feeling right now." Porter asked, "Right now?" I asked, "Yeah. Right now."