cough on coffee leftovers

a musical piece with a fiddle

and limping up the steps i added to my list of bad ideas:

drinking before early doctor appointments.

i don't really think you understand this.

i suppose i shouldn't want you to, but i do.

so i lied when i said i think about you

so i lied when i said i don't. so it's grey like a winter morning so it's cold.

i would like it if you could do what i want from you without me having to tell you.

i would love it if you could stop my heart.

for a little.

and bring it back again, i will love you

if you can fill my empty in

like filling a dent with concrete.

i am the dent. but you are not solid.

chimera in a man's clothes. i will love you even if you don't fix me.

i will love you but only if you don't apologise for my destruction.

now, darling, let us think,

a bargain at the crossroads, it's midnight and i've made one blood oath too many now, i always knew i'd find you here, so let's strike a bargain now.

what will it take for you to love me?