I lay awake thinking of you ~ l.s

Part 3

Louis could finally breathe again as he walked out of his last exam that Friday afternoon. It had not gone too well, but if he was lucky, he would at least be able to scrape a passing grade. He had tried, he really had, but it was hard to focus on writing in the romantic era when thoughts of Harry seemed to bubble up in his head every two seconds. Thoughts of Harry tipsy off of one too many glasses of wine that night, Harry snuggled up in Jacob's arms, or worse, Harry snuggled up in Jacob's bed.

Louis shook his head. No, he could not think like that. He thought back on Wuthering Heights that he had written his essay on, and realized with a pang that he was not much different from Heathcliff. If he really did love Harry, he should let Harry do what makes him happy. Which is to let him be with Jacob, even if that hurts him. It would hurt him more to be the one that hurts Harry. Harry who was his best friend, his confidant through thick and thin since they met that awkward and awful first day in high school. Harry who had offered him a seat at his lunch table, because of course Harry'd had no problem making friends to sit with. Harry who was the closest thing that Louis had ever gotten to feel love. Love felt like some sort of epidemy, he thought. It's everywhere, and disgustingly easy to get infected by. But then all it brings is pain; soul-crushing pain until you wither up and die, or succumb to it. Louis had to laugh quietly to himself, he sounded like a moody teenager.

His thoughts had occupied him for the entire walk from his school building to the train station, and onto the train that would bring him back home. Back to Harry.

When the train started rolling out of the station, Louis plugged in his earphones and put on his favourite album to drown out the background noise from the other passengers and pulled up his text conversation with Harry.

Lou: On my way home now, I'll change then come over? I can take the food on the way. Be there in about forty-five

Haz: Perfect! See you then x

Louis smiled, then texted his mother that he would be over in about half an hour to borrow the car. She said that he was welcome whenever and to tell Harry happy birthday from her. When he was done, he leaned back in his seat, enjoying the chill of the air conditioning keeping the humid mid-summer air out.

...

Louis swore as he had to stop at another red light. He was late, the queue at the catering place had been miles long for whatever reason and ever since leaving it he had matched every traffic light horribly, having to stop what felt like every two feet. He took his eyes of the road to text Harry that he would be there soon and that traffic was a pain in his ass. Harry responded with a thumbs up, which was a tad odd but Louis paid no mind as the light turned green and he sped off towards Harry's apartment.

When he finally got there and knocked on the door, arms full with boxes, he was almost an hour later than planned and Harry was a nervous wreck. He opened the door for Louis, letting him step through and closed it a little aggressively behind him.

"You alright?" Louis asked as he dumped the boxes down onto the kitchen island.

"Yup, totally fine." Harry nodded, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans shorts.

"You look a little tense, mate." Louis chuckled, giving him a onceover. "You sure you're okay?"

"I'm just—Nervous, I guess." Harry sighed.

"Why?" Louis asked as they began unpacking the food together and placing it on the countertop.

"I never host, I want it to be perfect." Harry sighed. "But I'm like- Nervous people won't have fun."

"I am sure they will," Louis reassured him. "You're giving them food and booze, and beer pong by the looks of it." He nodded towards the stack of red solo cups and Ping-Pong balls.