The Alpha is my Mate ✏️ (REWRITING)

Chapter 16

Staring at my hands, I know I should tell my parents sooner rather than later. After all, I don't have much time. "I think I will tell them now before I chicken out and wait until the last minute. I know it will be better if I give them more time to process." I mutter, feeling my heart race. I feel planted in my bed, scared about what will happen. Madison can sense my internal struggle and gently places her hand on mine. Hesitantly standing off the bed, I give Madison's hand a light squeeze before walking to my door.

"Good luck," she says to me with a wry smile. Giving her one back, I take a deep breath and open the door.

The walk down the hallway feels intense, and my heart hasn't slowed. The fear is washing over me, and I start overthinking. I'm not too fond of confrontation, and having to tell my parents the news makes me want to throw up. I love them so much, and the last thing I want to do is disappoint them. Rubbing my hand up and down my arm, I slowly descend the stairs. There's a part of me that hopes she isn't in there, but another part that hopes she is so I can get the anticipation off my chest.

Walking into the kitchen, I feel the cold air brush against my skin, giving me goosebumps. I see my mother isn't in the kitchen, and I give everyone a small smile. Someone says something to me, to which I respond before walking away. I don't have time for small talk right now because I feel like my heart will burst and my stomach is twisting.

I look down the hall and decide to walk toward the next possible place she could be. Some doors are slightly ajar, making noise in the room, while others are shut. Once I'm in front of the door, I slowly push the door to her office open, saying, "Mom?" The room is ice cold, and all the lights are off, with only the light from her computer bouncing off the walls.

Shutting the door behind me, I walk over to her desk and sit in the chair. Leaning back in it, I glance around the room. Her office has been the same way for as long as I can remember. My eyes stopped on one of the pictures and went off to the left side of her desk, and I just examined it. In the picture, young me is sitting on my father's shoulders with a big toothy grin. My mother is pressed to his side, and little Justin stands in front of her. We all look so happy, and it makes me smile. Gently picking up the picture, I turn it over and undo the backings on the frame. My mother always writes information on the back of each photo so she can never forget.

Justin- 8. Allie- 6. May 12, 2005

Justin's birthday happened a week after this photo. Assembling the frame and placing it in its spot, I look at the other images. There is one of just Justin and me from when we had to be about 12 and 9, and we are wearing matching onesies. I had a big grin on my face with Justin's arm wrapped around my shoulders.

Then there are two photos next to it; one is my senior photo, and the other is Justin's. In mine, I'm leaning against the railing of a bridge in a cute outfit. In Justins, he's against a brick wall of a random building with his arms crossed and a slight smile as if trying to look cool. Staring at the collection of photos that she had collected over the years on my mother's desk, I can't help but smile. Some memories of what the pictures captured cross through my mind, and I stay in the chair with my chin firmly planted in my hand.

My heart feels heavy as I think about leaving this packhouse and all my memories tucked into these walls. The collection of mine, Justin's, and Madison's heights over the years is written onto the door frame of this office. The scratches on the dining room table I would put on it using a mechanical pencil. All the laughs the three of us had while being kids. I feel a single tear slide down my cheek, remembering it all. Composing myself, I stand out of the chair and walk out of the office, shutting the door behind me. I need to find them and get this off my chest; if I don't, I don't know when I'll have the courage to do it.