5:54 am
i cover my eyes as i draw my curtains. Its 5:54 am and im wide awake. I breathe in the fresh morning breeze in my balcony wrapped in my yellow comforter.
Its monday and sophmore year starts today. Im still new at this new normal. I just came home from a psych hospital this summer and im still sinking in all the scenery of family and friends.
I have been in and out of the institution but this time i stayed for 3 years since i hit hard bottom and i was to harming myself so my family decided to get me help.
I still have appointments and community service starting today to keep me "on the road" i guess its not that bad i still get down days and moodswings i just get so overwhelmed with emotions but i also have good days.
"Lola..." My mom creeps on the door and comes in
"Yeah?"
"Lola are you ok?"
"Do you need anything?"
"Im good"
Im still in the impression that sending me into that tank of a hospital was not the best decision. Cause now i have bigger issues than i had back then.
8:11 am
New school. New people.
Walking down the hall full of unfamiliar faces. All my friends have already graduated one year earlier than me so im gonna start afresh on this. I cant be carried away. Im ok. Im gonna be ok.
Breathe in. Breathe out Lola your gonna be ok.
Things starting to feel blurry and my heart starting to beat faster. I think im gonna have a panic attack. Breathe in. Breath out.
"Are you ok?" A head peeped on my side while holding my shoulders
"I cant breathe " i said while holding my chest
"Ok let's sit down one minute" she said while guiding me to a bench infront of the teachers lounge
"Ok just breathe and relax" she said while miming me the breathing technique
I watch her as she shows me how to breath and i start to feel my chest calming down and getting my breathing down and steady.
"That's it thats right" she pats my back
"Thanks. Im lola" i said giving a big breathe out
"Im Jo. Your new right? Havent seen you here before" she said
"Yeah i just got here last summer" fixing myself
Just then the bell rings and all the people rushing around
"Your gonna be fine? Need help finding your way?" She said as she stands and fixes her shirt
"Im good this is my place" pointing at the teachers lounge
"Oh ok. If you need anything just find me " she says as she walks away.
Well that was a great way to make a friend. I just found myself being a burden in the first day back and now having anxiety attacks on hallways just great.
Its not about the new school and new environments. My anxiety attacks are just usually all about me and my head. I have a bad case of the cooties as they say. I chose to be alone cause i just dont find people too trusting and they all look like plastic cups to me. I dont find them interesting and the last group of friends i had has chose to abandon me on the side of the road when i needed them.
So i dont do friends i do myselves as i say it. Besides my sister is here she is a senior here but she rarely sees me cause we dont get along so well we have some issues. I once found her puke bag and almost told dad so since then she completely ignored my existence.
"Miss lecomte?" A teacher coming out of the door
"Yeah its me" i said
"Follow me i have here your schedule and your locker keys and you can figure out the rest. Welcome to East High" she says as she hands me the note
"Ok thank you miss?" I said
"Miss Adams" she says
3:23 pm
Im walking up a park that says here on my schedule is my new community service area. So im confused and dont know where to go. Its just that 3 years is a long time for a 16 year old.
Ok found it and a lot of stairs.
Going down the stairs i see the group of teenagers they must be my other companions in this adventure of picking up trash.
And then i see her and she stares at me
"You're lola?" She says as she beams me a tiny smile.
"Yeah sorry im late i lost on the way here" i say
"Its ok im Maya. So they are all paired up already so your stuck with me" she says as she hands me the boots and uniform.
"Is this all necessary?" I said with a hint of annoyance
"Haha why arent they sexy?" She chuckles flashing her dimples
I just smiled back.
She just smiled and i felt a thump
AUTHORS NOTE
Sooooo? What you guys think? Put down some comments i wanna know 😊
p.s if you wanna see them in uniform refer to the photo in the previews chapter "she"
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