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I knew that Jamals mother would be calling me in regards to his funeral arrangements, but I didn't really want to talk to her. Maybe I'd just ignore her calls.

Once I had thrown my trash away from my food I headed back upstairs, on the way there was one of his paintings propped up on the coffee table. I smiled slightly and sat on the couch just to marvel at it.

A black woman who's backside was covered in sheets. Her wild coiled hair flowed along her back while her head rested on her forearms. I got down on the floor to look even closer. He always made sure to pay attention to detail. There was a small black spot on the far left of her back... my birthmark. The day that this took place came back to me like a long lost pet. I closed my eyes to see everything clearly.

"Baby.. you've been working so hard let me do something for you"

"Jamal.. baby... I just wanna sleep..hold me?" I dropped my bags by the couch and he smiled as he walked over to me

"How about we watch a movie?.. yeah?" I nodded and pecked his lips.. they were always so soft and inviting.

"Let me go get everything.. sit on the couch" He pulled away from my lips with a sly grin and disappeared upstairs.

While I waited for his return I pulled my jacket off and got comfortable on the couch.

The sounds of his humming filled the room before his presence had a chance to. I just watched him grinning from ear to ear. He set up a little spot for us on the floor which was composed of two couch cushions and a sheet.

"Titanic?" he cheesed knowing I couldn't resist because it was my favorite movie

After he put the movie in and pressed play I tackled him, causing him to burst out in laughter. My arms found their way around his neck as my lower half straddled his waist. He laid us back while our lips locked like magnets.

I pulled away just to make sure I wasn't dreaming this. He was so perfect.. How? I admired his strong and detailed jaws then to his plush pillow-like lips and on up to his nose.. It was so cute. Finally his eyes.. They were like small snowglobes full of light and love.

"We would make beautiful children.." He spoke letting me know that he had taken this quiet time to admire my features too. The bass from his voice sent chills down my spine.

"I hope they get your talent and looks.. I don't have much to offer like that." A soft chuckle fell from my lips while his perfectly shaped eyebrows fixed themselves in a frown.

"Don't say anything like that Quin.. your talent is limitless.. your beauty is unmatched and your personality could never be cloned.. you're perfect. In every sense of the way, and I don't want to hear you saying anything different from that." He never liked when I tore myself down, but this was the first time he actually confronted me about it.

I didn't say anything.. theres was nothing I could say. I guess he saw all the gears turning in my head

"Let me show you how talented you are"

He turned us over so that he was hovering over me, and stared into my eyes as he unbuttoned my shirt. Once my black laced bra and flat stomach was exposed to the cool air he started kissing different areas of my chest. The warmth from his lips mixed with the cool air made goosebumps appear on my skin. His hands found their way to my breasts as his lips kissed along my collar bone, up my neck, across my jaw, and ending on my lips.

He slipped his hands under my bra and ran his fingers across my firm nipples, earning a low moan which was trapped in our kissing.

Before I knew it he had my skirt pushed up around my waist and he was positioning his face in between my thighs. I pushed my hair back from my face and propped myself up on my elbows to watch. He moved my underwear to the side and began his feasting.

I felt his tongue flick across my pearl which sent me into the early stages of euphoria. He worked his magic on me until I felt his fingers accompany his tongue. The sudden action earned a higher pitched moan, and caused me to throw my head back.

"I wanna hear you sing.." was the last thing I heard before I was overcome with several different sounds of moaning, groaning, and pleading with him not to stop. My face contorted and my body jerked and moved in ways that would land me in a straight jacket during any other scenario.

I pressed my head into the pillow while I pulled Jamals head further into my thighs. The pleasure was growing unbearable but he wouldn't dare stop now. My jaw dropped but no sound followed.

WHOOSH

My climax came like a tidal wave sweeping the shore.

The kind of head to put you to bed.. and that's exactly what I did.

I opened my eyes greeted by the painting once more. One tear fell.. just one lonely.. sad.. abandoned tear. I got up quickly and ran upstairs to the guest room where I let him keep all his finished paintings. As soon as I walked in the room it felt like him... i felt his presence.

I looked around at some of the half finished pieces, the sketches that were scatted across the floor in the corner, and even the finished pieces. They were all so beautiful in their own way. Just like Jamal.

What If he had opened up to me?.. what if he had shared his problems and we fixed them together? What if...

During the midst of my "what ifs" I had laid down on the floor looking through his sketches. With each picture came a different what if.. it went from what if Jamal did this.. to what if I close my eyes for a bit..

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