The Calamity Girls (Book 1)

Best Fronds

"Guys, guys, I just had the craziest dream where me and Rowena were trapped in a world of frog..." Anne screamed as she woke me up and the Plantar's were right in front of us. "Hey guys, sleep good?" Sprig asked. "Careful boy, they could be hungry," warned Hop Pop. "For your guts!" Polly added. "Were you guys watching us sleep?" I asked. "Besides, we wouldn't eat something that clearly doesn't bathe." Anne adds. "Fair point." Hop Pop said, eating a fly. "See, told you they were harmless." Sprig said. "For now." Hop Pop scoffed. "Just give me an excuse to use old Doris here." Polly said, holding a rolling pin. "Rowena, I think the little one wants to kill us." Anne said. I nodded. "Yup." Sprig adds, "So, you guys must be so excited to be trapped in another world, very jealous." "It's not all that, I miss my home, my stuff, and especially, my friends." Anne said, pulling out a Polaroid photo of her, Sasha, and Marci, handing it to Sprig. I rolled my eyes, but Anne and Sprig didn't notice. "Without them, I just feel kinda lost, you know." She continues. "What about you, Rowena, how come you aren't in Anne's photo?" Sprig asked me. We used to be friends, but Anne and I, we kinda drifted apart." I replied. "Well, you guys look like you need friends, so how's about I be your friend in the meantime?" Sprig offered. "You?" I asked. "Me!" Sprig replied. "You?" Anne asked. "C'mon, it'll be fun," Sprig said. "What did you do together?" "Everything, marathon dumb tv shows, and hung out at the beach." Anne replied. "We've got a lake, would going there with me make you feel less homesick?" Sprig asked. "I mean we did go to the beach a lot when we were friends, maybe going to the lake will possibly help us repair our friendship." I told Anne. She nodded. "Let's do it!" She said as we grabbed our swimsuits and sunscreen and got ready. "You ready to go?" Sprig asked. "Yeah yuh." We said as the three of us were stopped by Hop Pop. "And where do you three think you're going?" Hop Pop asked. "We're going to the lake." Sprig told his grandfather. "Why, you wanna come?" I asked. "Absolutely not!" He shouted. "Look, Anne, Rowena, you're new unsettling, strange, bizarre, HORRIFYING..." "Thanks, we got it." I said. "The point is the frogs in this town can be pretty small minded, and paranoid." Hop Pop explains. "We just need to give them time to get used to you, I think it's best you stay put." Hop Pop locks the door and hides the key in his pocket. "But..." Sprig started. "No but's, now I'm gonna go to my study to get a little reading done." Hop Pop orders. "Hop Pop!" Sprig groans. "Don't do anything stupid!" He said, closing the doors of his study. "Ugh, adults are all the same, curfews, rules, old." Anne complained. "Yeah, looks like we're stuck here, I know what'll be fun, let's try some of Hop Pop's pain peppers, so hot, they'll make you wish you were dead." Sprig said. He put his tongue on a pepper and his mouth caught on fire. "You're turn!" "No thanks, I'd rather go to the lake." Anne said. "Normally I'd disagree with you breaking the rules, Anne, but I really don't want to stay cooped up in here." I said. "But, Hop Pop said..." He started. "Sprig, you wanna know the best thing about friendship, when you got your friend by your side, anything is possible, whatever you want, a real friend will help you get, and you know what I want?" Anne asked. "The lake!" Sprig responds. "Yep, now let's go rob an old man!" She exclaimed. "That didn't sound as cool as I wanted it to."

Anne, Sprig, and I opened the door to the study to get the key from Hop Pop. "Any ideas?" I asked. "What if we use fishing line to lower me from the ceiling, then I could grab the key right out of Hop Pop's pocket." Sprig suggested as he knocked a vase over, which was carefully caught by Anne. Suddenly, we heard snoring coming from Hop Pop. "Do you guys hear that?" I asked. The snoring was getting louder. "No way." Anne whispers as we walked up to Hop Pop to see that he had his eyes wide open, but turns out he was asleep. Anne waves her hand in front of Hop Pop's face, but he didn't move. "This might be the creepiest thing I've ever seen." I said. "Happens all the time," said Sprig. "He makes a great scarecrow." Anne grabbed the key from his pocket and she smelled it. "You know what this smells like?" She asked Sprig. "A key that's been in an old man's pocket?" Sprig asked. "Freedom!" She corrected. "That was my next guess!" Sprig exclaimed. "Okay, let's go." I said.

We started walking toward the lake. "This is great, three pals, beating the odds to have some fun." Anne said as she pulled out her phone to take a selfie with me and Sprig. "Smile." "Whoa, hey, that turned out great." I said. Sprig looked at the photo in amazement. "I don't know what's crazier, that you just stole my soul into a tiny box, or that we look so incredible." Sprig said. "I gotta say, this friend business is amazing." "Didn't you have friends before we showed up?" I asked. "Kids around here don't really get me." Sprig replied. "Well, hey, they're missing out, c'mon guys." Anne said, playfully punching him. "So is punching a part of friendship?" Sprig asked. "Not always." I replied.

We walked through some bushes as we arrived at the lake. "We're here." Sprig said. "Wow, this is beautiful." Anne gasps. "Let's do it!" "Am I the only one that's worried about the sign that says "don't swim?"" I asked. "This was not here last week." Sprig said. "I know exactly what's going on here, some jerk just wants this beautiful lake all to themselves, well forget that." Anne thought out loud. "I don't know Anne, whoever wrote this was probably in a hurry, like they were scared to be here." Sprig warned. "Or maybe they just had bad handwriting, c'mon don't be a buzzkill." She said. Anne started walking toward the lake and dipped her foot in when Sprig grabbed her arm with his tongue. "Hey, what gives?" Anne asked. "Something's not right, let's just go back!" Sprig exclaimed. "I thought you were trying to be my friend." Anne groaned. "I am!" Sprig shouted. "Well, this is what friends do, remember, they help you get the things they want." Anne stated. "Look, if a friend likes a pencil case, you get it for them, if your friend likes your new shoes, you give them to her, and if your friend tells you to steal a crazy music box from a thrift store, even if you really don't want to, you do it, okay, because if you don't, they might not want to be your friend anymore." She said with guilt. Sasha really is a bad influence on Anne. Sprig walked away until I grabbed his arm and took him behind a bush. "Sprig, don't be mad at Anne, she doesn't really know what a true friendship is, don't tell her I said this, but Anne needs a real friend." I told him as him and I jumped into the lake, splashing Anne. "Aw, yeah, now that's what I'm talking about!" Anne exclaimed as she did a cannonball in the lake. We playfully splashed each other in the lake. I honestly never thought I'd ever hang out with Anne ever again. She took a picture on her phone of Sprig and I flexing when she saw a lake monster behind us. "I was blinking, wasn't I?" Sprig asked. We all screamed and swam as quickly as possible. "Stupid non webbed human hands." Anne said as she and I were far behind Sprig. "Anne, Rowena!" Sprig shouted as he dove underwater and rescued us. "That explains the sign." I stated. "Sprig, we're just slowing you down, buddy, get outta here." Anne said. "This was my fault anyway, I should've listened to you." Sprig punched her in the face. "Never, I'm not about to let my first real friends get eaten, we're in this together." Sprig said as the monster surrounded us. "Any ideas?" I asked. Sprig hopped on top of Anne's head. "I have a plan, Anne, stand up." Sprig ordered. "Uh, okay." She replied as she stood up. "When I count to three, duck!" Sprig exclaimed. "Dude, are you crazy?" She asked. "Just trust me," Sprig replied. "Alright, one, two, three!" Anne ducked, but Sprig was in the monster's mouth. "Sprig!" I yelled. "Vengeance!" Anne added. We climbed onto the monster and whacked it with sticks, when suddenly, smoke came out of it's mouth. Sprig was also alive and well. "You're alive!" We exclaimed in unison. "What did you do?" Anne asked. "So hot, they'll make you wish you were dead." Sprig said. "You little genius, you." I said. "Looks like he couldn't take the heat." Sprig joked, when suddenly, the monster growled again. "Run." Anne said. "Death, approaching!" Sprig shouted as we swam back to shore.

Back at the house, Hop Pop woke up from his nap and put down his book. "I'm up, I'm awake!" He shouted, checking his pocket. "The key, it's gone, oh no, did they get out, is the town rioting, are they dead, has Anne and Rowena eaten the kids, the whole town?" He ran to the door. "What's this now, it's still locked." Then Hop Pop ran to the basement to see Anne, Sprig, and I playing a game. "C'mon, momma needs a new pair of shoes, seriously though I do need new shoes." Anne said as I noticed that she was only wearing one of her sneakers. "You guys've been here all day, huh?" Hop Pop asked. "Yup, I'm on a winning streak." Anne replied. "I live in a mansion." I added. "And I owe Anne my firstborn child." added Sprig. "By the way, Hop Pop, we found this on the floor, you must've dropped it." Anne said, giving back the key and he went back upstairs. "Aha!" Polly shouted as she jumped out. "Sup, Polly?" I asked. "You're not gonna eat us are you, you're not even gonna try?" She asked. "Disappointing." Anne closed the door behind Polly. "Rowena, Sprig, sorry I almost got us killed today." She apologized. "Are you kidding me, that was the most exciting thing that's ever happened to me, my heart was beating faster than a dragonfly on a sugar rush, in fact, I'm feeling a little sleepy." Sprig said, dozing off to sleep, but luckily I caught him before he could fall down the stairs. "I'm getting sleepy too, goodnight, Anne." I said with a yawn as I took Sprig up to his room. Anne pulled out the Polaroid photo of Sasha, Marci, and her. "Sasha, Marci," Anne said to herself. "I hope you guys are okay, cause I am."