need

shower

hot water falls against my sensitive skin,
so tender and calming.
yet, at the same time, it awakens the thoughts,
the thoughts I would've hoped I could forget.

some days, I love it,
and some days, I hate it,
more than anything,
is it just me,

or do you feel the same, too?
is it really the water that I hate,
or is it the inevitable thoughts
that I hate so much?

for I will never find out.
I will never know,
oh how hot I can turn it up,
for I am scared.

scared of how hot I can turn it up,
the water,
in the shower.
the inevitable thoughts.

hot water falls against my sensitive skin.