Love All The Way

2| My lips are sealed

The next thirty seconds are the longest of my life. My hand slams on the button, repeatedly pressing the ground floor until the thing grinds into action. If it doesn't move quicker, I will die right here in this elevator.

Milo leans against the mirror to study me. His mouth twitches slightly like he finds this all amusing, making me furious. He must have known it was me he was kissing; my mask only covered my eyes. Why didn't he stop me?

I gnaw at my nail while he straightens out his tie. The cuff of his shirt rises ever so slightly, revealing half of a tattoo underneath. I'd done the one thing I'd promised I'd never do again: hook up with a coworker.

His taste still lingers on my tongue–mint and something sweet. Like a child, I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. Come Monday morning, everyone in the office will have heard about this encounter– they always do – and then what? I'll be known as that girl who can't separate her work from her personal life. No, even worse: I'll be known as unprofessional, and with the upcoming promotion, that's the last thing I want to be.

The wiping of my mouth smudges lipstick across my hand. I pull a tissue from the space between my cleavage, where I keep one stuffed for emergencies.

Milo watches in disgust. "Nice. Very lady-like."

The doors snap open. I ignore his comment and force myself past him, through the lobby, and out onto the frostbitten streets. I'm walking as fast as my heels will allow, but he easily keeps up.

"You're going to slip," he says, his voice deep and even. "It's the type of thing you'd do."

I don't bother to look at him, but inside, I am hurt. Ever since he joined Long Bridge Real Estate, he's had this warped idea that I'm the ditsy office klutz. Now I assume it's more the ditsy office slut.

Further down the street, a black Audi unlocks, and I turn to see Milo with the key. He strides right past me like the giant he is, advancing toward his car. He opens the door and turns to me, looking impatient. "Get in."

He must be insane. "I'm not going anywhere with you. You've been drinking."

"I don't drink," he says, "and I'm driving you home. Get in."

For about three seconds, I contemplate saying no. In the two years we've worked together, he's hardly said two words, let alone ridden with me in the same car. But Ubers are pricey, and it's too cold to wait, so I reach for the passenger door. He raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything as he gets in. With a brief look in the rearview mirror, he glances over. "This is a new car. Don't make a mess."

"Why would I make a mess, Milo?"

He turns on the engine before checking his side mirrors. "Because you're messy. Your desk is covered in crap."

I'm truly offended, because the things on my desk aren't crap; they are things of sentimental value. "Not everyone can be as unsentimental as you."

He ignores me and says, "Are you giving me your address, or am I going to have to guess?"

I give him directions and then recline in my chair. The car smells just like him, a mix of mint and Pinewood and a hint of vanilla. I would think the smell pleasant if it wasn't coming from him.

He says nothing for several blocks. I focus on my feet, which are starting to ache in these old Manolo heels. Milo Woods has tasted my mouth. Milo Woods has grabbed my thighs. How will I ever live this down?

"We should probably talk about this." My voice is small and husky sounding; I clear my throat.

"What's there to talk about?"

My cheeks burn. It's probably easy for someone like him to act like nothing ever happened, but if I don't clear the air, I will die with embarrassment for the rest of the weekend, forever dreading Monday. One office rendezvous is an accident, twice is a pattern – one that will not escape Laurelle's notice.

"You kissed me," I say.

"You kissed me first."

"Because I didn't know who you were!"

His eyes dart over, bright and mocking. "Do you often go around kissing people you don't know?"

We're getting nowhere because Milo is just as evasive and annoying as he is when we're at work. "You're avoiding the question."

He sighs like I'm giving him a headache. "You threw yourself at me." He changes lanes, overtaking a car before glancing over. "What did you want me to do, shove you off me?"

I shake my head because I just can't believe this. I could never kiss a man I hated just because he'd kissed me first. Obviously, feelings don't matter to someone like Milo as long as he's getting laid.

When he's distracted by the road, I glance at him. His mouth is still smudged with my lipstick, making his lips look all red. All I can hear as I look at him is Lucas going: stripper red, stripper red, stripper red.

"What are you staring at?" Milo steals his eyes from a traffic light to shoot me a withering look.

I look away, remembering how it felt to be pressed against that elevator. If anyone finds out, it'll ruin my reputation. "If you ever," I say, "and I mean ever, whisper a word of this to anyone, I will hunt you down, Milo Woods. I will hunt you down, and I will make you suffer."

His eyes grow dark, but I don't miss the fact they are laced with amusement. "My lips are sealed."

He glances at my dress for a second, which has ridden up my thighs. I pull it back down and look out the window, counting the buildings to calm me. If only one thing has come from this little rendezvous, it's that Jess was right. While I wish my kiss tonight had been with anyone but Milo, it had distracted me from Lucas. I hadn't thought about him once until now, which means there is hope for me yet.

Milo pulls up outside of my apartment but doesn't kill the engine. I shimmy in my seat, trying to pull my dress down enough so that I don't flash him when I get out.

Finally, I turn to face him. "Thanks for the ride," I say, opening the door. "See you at work, Milo." I don't look back, but I can feel him watching me as I navigate the icy path. I tell myself that if I only get one wish for the rest of my life, please let it be that I don't slip in front of Milo.

Only once I'm inside can I finally breathe. Mulan jumps off the table top and titters toward me, wrapping her tail around my legs. I squat down to give her belly a rub, and she purrs.

"I've done something awful," I say, pulling her onto the sofa. She climbs on my lap and kneads her paws on my dress, scratching my skin through the material. "I can never show my face at work again. I'll have to move. What about Hawaii? You want to go to Hawaii?" Mulan meows, so I take it as a yes. "Good. The main draw is that there's no Milo there."

Mom calls around eleven to make sure I'm alive. She thinks I won't survive without Lucas, so every night, I spend an hour convincing her I'm fine. Afterward, I curl up on my sofa with red wine and flick through Lucas' posts. I know I shouldn't torture myself, but I scroll until I see Alison and then wish that I hadn't. There is a picture of them standing behind a fireplace with His and Her Christmas stockings, her hand outstretched as she proudly flashes her ring. Lucas had spent two years bragging about how he would marry me, only to propose to her in three months.

I keep scrolling until I can no longer stomach their faces and then peel off my clothes, leaving them in a heap on the floor. It's only once I've washed my face and crawled into bed that I get a text from Jess. In all the trauma and drama of tonight, I'd forgotten to tell her I was leaving, so I expect it to be her scolding me for it, but it's not. Instead, I open her text to find something much, much worse.

You and Milo Woods?!

So, that's that, then. I am moving to Hawaii.

A/N

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