Very DrARrY one-shots

Fire in the common room

This is legitness

⚠️ WARNINGS ⚠️: just a sex reference thingy at the end idk read it it's fine ig

Harry couldn't believe it.

What the actual fuck was going on?

He had been taking a peaceful shower, not worrying about anything for literally once in his life when he suddenly smelt smoke, and immediately worrying he quickly put on his clothes, not even bothering to dry his body from the water and ran outside, only to see that the Gryffindor common room was chaos,

People were running and screaming, trying to find an exit and Harry suddenly knew why,

The common had caught on fire.

He didn't know how it happened, but his hero side suddenly snapped into action and he quickly led everyone out of the common room safely, the worst happening is some people's faces becoming dirty and ashy from the smoke, but nothing too serious.

Dammit he had to take another shower now.

"What the bloody hell happened?" Harry snapped, but everyone remained silent. Harry was mad, and when he got mad, everything would go to hell, "why was it on fire?!" He hissed again. His first thought to what had happened was one of the Weasley twins pranks going wrong, or someone forgetting to put the fire out beforehand from the fireplace,

Shaking his head at the lack of his dorm mates responses, he sighed, "let's just find a Dumbledore and explain what happened." He said, and with Ron and Hermione by his side, he led everyone down the halls and to the direction of Dumbledores office,

"Ah, Harry my boy- and the rest of the Gryffindors? What brings you to me?" Dumbledore questioned, a fatherly tone in his voice,

"Well you see sir.. it appears that the common room was.. set on fire." Hermione said quietly, hanging her head down in shame from all the school rules she had broken to get out of the common room,

"Oh? And how had that happened?"

No one spoke and Harry sighed, "I.. we're not sure, sir.." Harry mumbled, feeling slight empathy for his dorm mates and not wanting them to get in trouble,

Dumbledore nodded slowly, "I see.. anything else you needed?" He questioned popping a lemon drop in his mouth and sitting down in his chair,

Harry rose an eyebrow, "sir.. the common room was set on fire, shouldn't we be.. doing something right now?" He questioned with a confused tone,

"Harry, what do you think you should do?" Dumbledore questioned, his eyes twinkling , and Harry stared at him for a second before groaning,

"UGh I don't got no time for your puzzles and riddles bullshit I just want another shower." He said, snatching a piece of candy off of Dumbledores desk, and noticed the man to be sleeping and thinned his lips before leading everyone out of the Headmasters office,

"Well that was a waste of time. What do we do now twiddledee?" One of the Gryffindors asked, looking at another Gryffindor beside them,

"I don't know twiddledo, I don't know." He said,

"Hey, how about we try bunking with another house?" Another student, Ms Keisha questioned and a couple other students nodding their heads in agreement,

"What about the Hufflepuffs? They're a nice lot."

"Nah they have Jared and he doesn't know how to fucking read I ain't bunking with someone who's missing the intelligence part of their brain."

"What about the Ravenclaws? They're fairly smart.. maybe they could help out?"

"No I heard one of them doesn't like chicken strips so fuck them I love my chicken strips and if you don't like chicken strips then gimme your fuckiNG MONEY SO I CAN BUY SOME OF MY OWN."

"What about the.. Slytherins?" Finally someone with a normal name questioned, and that made Harry stop in his tracks,

The Slytherins..

Sure, they didn't have the strongest liking towards Harry but who gives a fuck,

"Yeah.." Harry said, agreeing with the person with the normal name, "yeah let's go to the Slytherins." He said again, this time more confidently, and everyone looked at each other before quickly following Harry in the direction of the Slytherin dorms,

Knocking loudly on the painting, after a couple of seconds it opened, revealing a first year Slytherin,

"Move bitch." Harry said, shoving the kid out of the way and leading everyone inside,

"Um.." a Slytherin, Blaise Zabini said slowly, looking up from his spot on the couch next to Draco and Pansy to face the Gryffindors,

"What the hell are you Gryffindorks doing here?" Draco hissed, quickly standing up and and pulling his wand out and pointing it straight at Harry who rolled his eyes,

"Relax Malfoy you hot daddy let me explain." Harry said, and Draco raised an eyebrow, but shook his head and put his wand away, "so basically," Harry started, "the Gryffindor common room caught on fire and we had to come here because the Hufflepuffs had Jared and the Ravenclaws don't like chicken strips." He explained, and that's when Pansy Parkinson stood up,

"Go away you Gryffindorks! We don't want to see you here!" She shrieked and Harry glared at her,

"Shut up no one wants to see your crusty musty ghetto Dora shrek ears pug nosed fre-sha-vocado looking face anywhere." He said, before turning back to Draco, "so anyways, we have to stay here deal with it." He said, allowing everyone else to fully step inside before the painting snapped shut behind them,

"Wow nifty mifty place you got here." Ron whistled, Draco scoffed and turned around before feeling a ball of paper hit the back of his head, he quickly turned back around,

"Whoever threw that paper your moms a hoe!" He hissed and Harry dramatically gasped,

"Bitch I have no mama the fuck is wrong with you!" He yelled, and Draco frowned,

"Sorry then wanna have sex to make up for it?"' he asked, and Harry thought for a second,

"Yeah sure why not." He replied and the two of them went upstairs into Draco's bedroom to have sex with each other because that's legitness.

Yeah idk what this is either

BYEEeeEeEeEEEEeEeEe

<3