On a gloomy day in Deadpool's apartment, he gets a call from a guy named John Allerdice but people call him Pyro. He invites him to a group of mutant mercenaries named The Marauders. The fact that is a group of mutant mercenaries? Of course he's joining!
Deadpool: Hellur.
Pyro: Are you Mr. Pool?
Deadpool: Yes I is, how can I help? Any folk who owes money?
Pyro: No. Since you're a mutant in the field of mercenaries, I want to you in my team The Murauders. We need a guy like you when it comes to killing without that much damage.
Deadpool: And?
Pyro: And you'll get payed $4,000 a kill.
Deadpool: I'm fucking in!
Deadpool hangs the phone and packs his things. He looks at the address sent to him and drives there but as he is driving to the destination, he gets caught in traffic after an idiot crashes someone so he can get injured, not work and get his insurance to pay for it. San Francisco, gotta love it there. While waiting Deadpool's bored ass plays 'Animals by Maroon 5' and when the traffic finally ends, he got so in tuned with the music that he got honked at. He finally arrives to the destined location and parks his car. While Deadpool walks into an alleyway, he hears a bunch of metal clanking. He turns around and only finds a crackhead with his pants off and shit on the side walk instead of the car as he is terrified. Deadpool walks back into the alleyway and opens the door but gets stopped by a guy in a trench coat with one eye glass and sniper. It was non other than Deadshot. Deadpool was shocked as he's only contacted him through the dark web.
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Deadpool: What up 'shot!
Deadshot: What up 'pool!
They shake hands and Deadshot asks about Task Force X.
Deadshot: So I heard you was at Waller's thing.
Deadpool: How do you know that shit?
Deadshot: Dark Web, nigga.
Deadpool: Man, y'all be stalking folks. Hold up, why are you here, you ain't even a mutant.
Deadshot: Business.
Deadpool: All right, then. Keep your secrets.
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Deadpool walks into the building and finds fellow mutants in costumes just like him and he feels so excited.
Deadpool: Oh my god my family! 😄
The fellow mutants look at Deadpool and frown in disgust but he doesn't care. He's glad he's not the only mutant with a costume. All these mutants are just grouchy and don't even show one grin while Deadpool is walking confidently like an old Mickey Mouse cartoon. He goes to physically meet Pyro and finally knows what he looks like. He's a Latino like Deadpool but he dyes his hair blonde and wears a suit. In excitement seeing a fellow Latino mutant, Deadpool vigorously shakes his hand.
Deadpool: Wass good brotha'!
Pyro smiles and asks him to sit down and they negotiate about Deadpool's deal in this sketchy room.
Pyro: So, Mr Pool. It's good to see that you've accepted the offer and now I need your requirement. If you may?
Deadpool: Hell yeah.
Deadpool sends a video from a while ago. This was the same video he sent to join the society of mercenaries. It was a video of him doing a crazy crime. The usual video for an average mercenary is them burning up a car, robbing a store or if it goes extreme, they make a snuff film. For Deadpool, it was a snuff film. Pyro watches the video and he is actually impressed.
Pyro: Wait? You actually did this?
Deadpool: Did what?
The video shows a series of clips of Deadpool planting land mines in a grass field in Harrison, Alabama. It was a KKK Rally. Go figure. While planting the land mine, Deadpool just starts giggling like a little girl because he's doing what he's always wanted and he even records the explosion.
In the footage:
Deadpool: Alright y'all, this gon' get crazy. So I finished burying the bombs and now The KKK is gonna come any minute and I gotta hide. Oh shit here they come.
Deadpool hides in the bushes and records the speech. He ultimately had to stop recording because the racist ranting just got too old and too boring.
KKK Guy: We're the Klu Klux Klan and we hate chinks, beaners, Jews and especially niggers! They think they're so pure when they look like porch monkeys and when we're the pure humans. What does white mean?
Rest of the rally: Purity!
KKK Guy: that's right! White power brother!
Deadpool turns on his phone to record again right when they're cheering and can't wait to see what this dumbass speaker is going to do.
KKK Guy: We gonna burn these niggers.
Boom! The land mines activated and Deadpool captures it!
Deadpool: I did it! I stopped racism!
He turns off the camera in his phone and runs faster than Usain Bolt to not get caught! Now let's get back to the present. Pyro loved the footage and he let Deadpool in.
Pyro: With the energy you got and passion for killing like the psycho you are. You're in.
