Crime Capers International

The Arabia

The ad was simple enough:

         Plot consultant available. Is your crime story stuck in cliche-land? Need a clever escape?  A classic caper? Our experienced consultants can help. Reasonable rates.

It was one of those pop-up ads at the side of my computer screen. Normally I would ignore it but I had just been googling that topic. I clicked on the query link. I thought it wouldn't hurt to see what they had to offer.

Less than twenty minutes later, my phone rang. "This is Robert, from Crime Capers International. I am returning your call."

"I didn't call you."

"Well, ok. You were inquiring about help for your crime novel. Let me tell you a little bit about myself. I started from the ground up, learned my craft from my dad. I spent several years as a sidekick before I planned my first solo job. I have twenty successful capers under my belt. I am reformed now, I should mention that. Let's see... what else. Oh, I know when and how to leave clues to sustain interest and maintain balance in your story and I don't do murder, any questions so far?"

I was a bit overwhelmed. "I don't understand," I told him. "Are you an editor or a criminal?"

"The two are not mutually exclusive. Think of me simply as a resource, an expert in the field of crime. I guarantee I can help your novel."

I didn't trust him at first, but the truth was, my story did need help; I was floundering in a morass of banality. We talked for almost an hour on that first call and I sent him my manuscript. Over the next few weeks, he really did help me, I admit that. He showed me a new world, a new way of thinking. He taught me to think like a thief.

That was how I found myself in Kansas City, Missouri, a month later, casing the Arabia Steamboat Museum. It was the third museum on my list and I quickly decided it was the perfect setting. Following Robert's advice, I did not announce myself to the staff but acted as though I was truly planning a heist. I came away with hundreds of pictures and a renewed excitement about my story.

The Arabia foundered and sank in the Missouri River in 1856. It was exhumed in 1988, it's cargo nearly intact. For my story, I added a keg of uncirculated gold coins to the horde.

                                                                                             ~~~

"So I guess your novel was a big success, after the robbery?" The detective wanted to know.

"It has been doing well, but you have to believe me, I had no idea Robert was actually planning to rob the place. I was just there to research my story."

"And you never met him?"

"No. Everything was done online."

"Ok. I'll have this typed up for you to sign, then you can go home."

I heaved a sigh of relief. Robert was right about this, too. "Just tell them the truth, and you will be alright," he told me. "But you might want to leave out the part about the new bank account I set up for you in Curacao."