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Sugawara Koushi
fluffy angst

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Like always she looked at him from afar.
Her heart fluttered strongly as he smiled brightly to his friends.
It had been months now since she had felt this feeling muster up inside her, ever since she met Sugawara she had started feeling this way ever since.

Although it wasn't all that new to her. She has felt this feeling before, yet every time she sees him it's somehow different.
What she feels about him was something she couldn't explain. It wasn't like anything she really felt before.

Maybe it was because of the way his unexpected enthusiasm and energy contrasts his usual caring and gentle demeanor, or the way he has a contagious laugh that even when his jokes weren't funny you would still find it hilarious. Maybe it's the way he shows compassion to others and how he helps those who need it. He's kindness that he shows to everybody and how caring he is to everyone around him.

But most importantly his smile.
His smile could brighten up her entire day in school even when she was in a bad mood. His smile brings flowers and butterflies into her heart even when she was sad.
His smile; that sadly only she could see from afar.

From afar. where she always has been.
There where for her is enough. Where she's contented.

Because for her, seeing him was already enough. Seeing him smile brightly would already be a gift.
Because for her she didn't deserve him.
He deserves everything good, and every ounce of affection and love he had given.

She looked away from him, hoping that she didn't stare too long, she turned her back and walked away.

All she could do was convince herself. Convince that she was already contented and that she was fine, looking from afar.
If only she was brave enough. If she had the courage to try.
Then maybe, just maybe; his smiles could be for her as well.

"Maybe I do love you."

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Sugawara looked back and saw the girl walk away. His heart ached a bit when she left, he lost his chance again to talk to her.

He kept encountering the girl coincidentally, yet everytime he can't get the opportunity to talk to her.
For weeks now he tried his hardest to approach her, yet every time he gets sidetracked or distracted by others.

Like fate, just doesn't want them to meet.
But he didn't want to give up, His curiosity got the better of him. He needed to talk to her, he wanted to know her. He has to.

She always had the usual frown or poker face that makes his heart unsettled. Maybe it was his pride, but he wanted to see the female smile.

"I want to get to know you."

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Author's Note: