They All Say I've Met a Ghost

5

I stood in the living room howling for a while, but the doors of the two rooms stayed shut.

What could I do? I couldn't be like Mr. Saw and pick up a chainsaw to vent my frustration. I had to stomp downstairs and go to the 24-hour convenience store by the estate's gate to buy a plunger, a pair of rubber gloves, and scissors.

Back at 404, the hair was still floating in the toilet. Maybe because the water was overflowing, there was more hair than before. I put the plunger aside and tried to flush. The thick wig was clogging it up so that it couldn't flush at all. The toilet bowl was completely clogged.

It was time to use my newly purchased Toilet Clearing Suction Device!

I aimed the plunger at the pipe and wildly pressed down. The water even went down a little, but the hair was still floating there. It hadn't come up and it hadn't been forced down. I followed the instruction manual, pressing down and flushing for over half an hour. Sometimes the hair would go down for a while, then it would fan out again. I couldn't resolve the clogged toilet problem at all.

There was nothing else to do. I had to use my method of last resort.

I put on the rubber gloves, picked up the scissors and started cutting away the hair. The plunger used air to force the pipe clear, creating a vacuum. It used pressure to force the object blocking the water pipe to dislodge or dissolve. But with the hair itself tangled around the pipe, it seemed this small amount of pressure wasn't going to be enough. But if I kept cutting the hair piece by piece it should loosen the tangle.

Come to think of it, this wig was pretty good quality. It must have been made out of real hair. This type of wig was much more costly than the kind made out of synthetic fibers. Which of my colleagues was so wasteful as to throw away such an expensive thing?

When I had cut away all the hair, I furiously went at it with the plunger again. This time the result was good. I heard a thunk, and the tangled hair finally came loose. I pressed down on the toilet handle again. This time all the hair was flushed down.

To prevent some strands of hair from coming up again, I didn't ease up until I'd flushed several more times.

By the time I was through with all of this it was one o'clock. My forehead was covered in sweat. I earnestly washed the gloves, plunger, scissors and myself, put everything away, then finally left the bathroom.

As soon as I walked out, I jumped. There was a man wearing black-framed glasses and a Zhongshan suit standing in the living room looking at me.

I felt embarrassed. Pointing to the bathroom, I said, “Sorry, did I wake you? The toilet was clogged. I cleared it up."

He gazed intently at me without speaking. I had to find something to keep talking about.

"Someone threw a wig into the toilet. I was afraid it would interfere with other people using it, so I tried to flush it. My name is Shen Jianguo. I just moved in today. We'll be roommates from now on. What should I call you?"

I warmly held out my hand.

But he kept his hands in the pockets of his suit pants and stared at my hand. In a hoarse voice he said, "Liu Sishun. I've lived here several years."

I remembered that I had just flushed the toilet. Even though I had washed my hands, there were people who might take issue anyway. I awkwardly drew my hand back and said, "I'm very sorry to bother you."

Liu Sishun looked very refined. He didn't seem like a transvestite. The wig probably wasn't his.

"It's fine. I go to bed late."