The Law and the Codas

Chapter Thirty-One

I return to my cot - empty, cold, not unlike the one I'd slept on in the Facility.

I'd thought for certain Della would have laughed at my pathetic attempt to be like one of her soldiers, but she hadn't. She'd just stood there, eyes boring into mine as cracks in that unnerving gunmetal gray gaze of hers showed slivers of compassion or empathy or whatever it was Della could feel.

Flopping back onto the bed, staring at a ceiling, the reality of what I'd done, and what I'd committed myself to comes crashing down. Was this sensation of overwhelming pressure, squeezing on my insides like a compactor, what it felt like to have the whole world collapse on you?

At the very least, Mara and Sam would be safe and I'd ensure the others were kept safe too. A leader was someone who came back a little less dead than her troops, Della had told me. But that was a half-truth. A leader was also someone who was willing to not come back at all if it meant saving a fellow soldier.

12:02:00

Closing my eyes, I heave a sigh and tug the covers up to my shoulders. A soldier couldn't be useful without their sleep. Just this once, I hope my nightmares aren't plagued by the dead boy's eyes.

...

Today's breakfast potatoes and gravy are the things of nightmares, much like Mara's snoring. At Ellie's hand, the potatoes had been burnt, crispy cubes more akin to charcoal bricks than food, the gravy lumpy, gray snot. The whole meal has the appeal of an oozing pustule and as I jab my fork at the gravy, watching as it jiggles in response, I'm thankful for my lack of appetite.

My mood doesn't have any adverse effects on the others' appetites. They eat with the voracity of starving animals, grinding potatoes into mush and slurping down the congealed gravy. Sam shovels a heap of potato into his mouth, chomping down gleefully as brown bits stick to the corners of his lips.

"It's going to be so awesome having you back," he says, running a sleeve over his mouth to mop up some gravy that's clung to his chin like toothpaste. "You missed so much! The Brights are awesome! They have so many V-cafes, and everyone's always walking around on the Net. I got to play an online racing game." He puffs out his chest. "After we'd delivered Elysium of course." He leans over the table, a grin spreading. "I won."

"Wish I could have been there," I say. Sam stops rubbing his forehead and blinks. His smile slowly returns. "I'd have bet on you, against all odds."

Sam slaps the table, his cheeks puffing out like a squirrel whose stuffed to capacity. Scooping up a forkful of gravy, the mass trickling down the prongs in true slo-mo fashion, he says, "And you would have won too. A ton of creds. "

Mara smiles and I chuckle.

"who knows, maybe I will," I say. This coaxes one of Mara's bell-like laughs from her lips.

Right as Sam's about to rebuke my last comment, Sin surfaces, plodding in from downstairs, where he'd undoubtedly been worked as the pack mule the Codas see him as. He's sporting a pair of dirty overalls, cuffs rolled up to mid-calf, sleeves were torn off. Either for mobility or because Sin felt like it. His biceps glisten under a sheen of sweat, grease streaking down his chins and tinting his fingertips gray.

"Jae-beom!" Sam jumps to his feet and begins flailing like a beached squid. "Over here!"

I turn toward Mara. "Jae-beom? Now he's managed to remember Sin's identity?"

Mara nods, her eyes brimming with familial pride.

"Huh." I rest my chin on my fist. "One-upped by Sam."

Mara turns to face me. "You say something?"

I shake my head. "Nothing important. Just that Sam's really coming into his own."