Are You Sure?

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Me, Jess, Johnnie, and Bryan are staying at a hotel until I am ready to go back to California.

The past few days I've been sneaking to my house and grabbing a few of my things and shoving them in suitcases.

My mom ABSOLUTELY doesn't want me to move, especially with two boys. I haven't even told her about me and Johnnie dating.

She just pissed me off so badly that I don't think I want to see her again.

I've been in and out of the doctors office, always checking on the tumor.

They say that it's staying the same, but I can tell that they are lying. The tumor is probably getting bigger.

Me and Johnnie are going to the doctors again today for the 4th time this week.

"Are you sure you want to come?" I asked him. He nodded and started up the car.

"I wouldn't leave you alone in there." He was concentrated on the road.

"Johnnie, you don't understand. It can go from fine to horrible in a matter of minutes." I said.

"Yes I know that Roxy. I've experienced the entire thing before." He said, talking about how his dad died from cancer.

One night he was perfectly fine and the next night he died. Poor Johnnie.

He pulled into the parking lot of the doctors office.

"Are you sure?" I asked him again, making sure.

"Yes, now come on. We are already late." He smiled at me and grabbed my hand.

I walked up to the front desk. "Rochelle Waterfield is here." I said nicely.

The lady looked up at me and then back down.

"The doctor will be out in just a second. You can go sit in the waiting room." She said rudely.

"What was up her ass today?" I whispered as we walked away. Johnnie chuckled.

We sat down for maybe 15 minutes before a nurse came out.

"Rochelle Waterfield, the doctor will see you now." She said. I stood up and Johnnie followed me to the room where we waited another 10 minutes.

"Hello again Rochelle." The doctor laughed.

"I'm guessing your getting sick of me." I laughed along.

"No, not at all. Take a seat up on the bed." He gestured.

"So, we are looking at some major changes in the tumor. We can't see if it is good or bad but there is definitely change." He said. I nodded, following along with him.

"Can you take one more check?" I asked him.

"I'm supposed to go to California next week but if I don't know what the hell is going on with this tumor, then I can't go." I said.

"Rochelle, we are doing our best. Let me just go check the X-ray one more time." He walked out of the room.

I laid my head back down on the bed.

"It'll be ok." Johnnie took my hand and squeezed it.

"We don't know that, he said it was a major change." I sat back up and looked him in the eyes.

"Well I'm saying that It'll be ok." He kissed my forehead lightly.

Every time he kisses me, I get butterflies in my stomach, just like the first time.

"Ok, so we have news." The doctor came back in the room. My heart raced even faster than it was before.

"I'm sorry to say this but the tumor is growing at rapid speed. We don't know how to stop it." He said. My heart stopped, or at least it felt like that.

"You've got to be kidding, right?" I asked, tears in my eyes. Johnnie squeezed my hand tightly.

"I'm sorry but no. You will be able to go to California, but you will only have a couple months to live." He said.

"Are you sure?" I asked, letting a tear slip down my face.

"Yes, I am sure." He said.

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