(A/N- Italics are song lyrics.)
The best of friends
Like sister and brother
I looked at the woman standing not far away from me. Her long raven colored hair sat partially behind one of her ears and with the rest on the side of her face. From as long as I could remember, that's how she wore it. It was almost as if one side was ready and able to be a curtain to mask her face if needed. Whenever she allowed it to cover the beauty she was blessed with I hated it. The contrast of her hair color to her skin and eyes were striking. Her hair was so dark, but skin so milky and light. Almost like Snow White except with bright Hazel eyes.
I still remember the day I met Haven. It was one of the first days at the Art Center and never in my life had I met someone who I was just drawn to. It wasn't even just her looks. It was the entire package. She was so fucking talented, smart and funny. Not to mention she was drawn to many of the musical artists I admired. Haven blasting rap while going along with the lyrics made creating art together that much more fun. From very early on I found that I wanted to be around her. Much like her name, she was my Haven. I went to her for everything. Stress, disappointment, happiness, excitement. It didn't matter the emotion I was feeling, I just went to her to spend time and feel at home. Haven, much like myself, would come to me as well. Nothing about our friendship was one sided and that was always so clear. We relied on one another which was obvious to others in our lives. Maybe that's why everyone always thought we were so much more than 'just friends'. Our reliance on one another went beyond a typical friendship at times and it took the flood gates opening for me to realize this.
"Dude, nothing matters when Haven is around. You hang on every word she says and when she gives advice you follow it," Mark chuckled shaking his head. "You can say that's 'not true' and 'bullshit' all you want. However, I have known you for many years and you've never been that way towards me. Only Haven. So either you're fighting what's actually there or you're just an idiot."
"I'm neither of those," I said with a narrow eyed glance. "She's one of my best friends. That's all it is. Haven understands the stress I go through and offers me assistance with my projects when I need it."
"What am I then? Chopped liver?" Joe joked, throwing a chip in my direction. Mark held his hand out in emphasis to his previous statements.
"Why is this a big deal? What is wrong with me going to Haven for a lot?"
Mark shook his head. "It's not bad that you do that. It's bad that you don't realize why you do it."
The day everything changed for me concerning Haven was a day I still remember vividly. It was a day that started like any other. I woke up, went to class and then went to meet up with Haven. Unlike all the other days though, she wasn't alone. A man was beside her talking and laughing along with the woman I was supposed to be meeting. Haven looked...happy and not in a way I had seen before. It was then that I felt my heart falling into my stomach. My blood rushed through my body in a temperature I would imagine lakes freeze at. I felt horrible. Instead of walking closer, I left.
Don't know what to say
Never meant to feel this way
From that moment, everything seemed to change between Haven and I. It didn't matter how much I tried to push these feelings away, they were just there. Eventually little habits we had between us that had always been there like long hugs or cuddling during movies, were things I couldn't do anymore. Not when I clearly had feelings for her. Haven's face the first time I released our hug earlier than usual or made an excuse as to why I couldn't hold her while watching a movie was enough to cause me to put up this wall. It was a wall I never expected to have to put up towards her. Yet there it was.
