💛oct 20 tuesday

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i tried the raven method. while i was nearing one hundred, around 55 or so, i felt my libs go heavy, and i could smell roses- roses is what i wrote in my script on what i would smell when i was close to shifting. i was scared at first, but relaxed. it suddenly got all cold, and my body felt light, like it was floating. i could see the lamp image in my dr room forming, but it disappeared when i panicked.

but the problem was, my eyes kept opening. i can't control it. it's like it's just peaking out. i'm going to buy a sleeping mask. so i was definitely there. i then forgot what to do after 100, and proceeded to check my script. i tried again, but i was now anxious. so it didn't work.

i have no idea whether i was close or not. this is my first time shifting. now my legs hurt. my legs always hurt when i'm stressed. anyways, don't be like me. don't be a coward, or you'll never reach your goal.

this is my first attempt, so hopefully- wait no. next time, i have shifted. just keep your thoughts positive guys. we'll get there.

𝚊𝚜𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚢💛

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