i knew you - ron weasley

The First Day Without You

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss
I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs
The smell of smoke would hang around this long
'Cause I knew everything when I was young

Cardigan, Taylor Swift
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Ron Weasley was a mess. He had been since he'd broken up with Cassiah that fateful summer afternoon, just days before he and his classmates were returning for their senior year. Now he was starting his final year at Hogwarts single and without his girlfriend, but more importantly, his best friend.

Sure, he had Harry to mess and joke around with, but Harry wasn't much use for anything more serious. It wasn't like he could talk to Harry about stuff the way he did with Cassie. He'd never felt that comfortable with anyone before – even before they were dating, he had always been naturally drawn to her, naturally inclined to trust her with his most troubling of thoughts. Before he and Cassiah were close, he used to sometimes talk to Hermione about that sort of thing, but now that he'd broken up with Hermione's best friend, she wasn't really an option anymore either.

He slumped down onto his bed, across from Harry's as usual, and sighed wistfully. Here he was, about to start his final year, and he had no future plans. All his friends chatted excitedly about what lay ahead for them, but for Ron, his only plan had been building a life with Cassiah. Now, he was completely lost and floundering trying to figure out what he wanted to do with his life. The worst part was, the only person who he felt comfortable opening up to about this desperate, insecure feeling of the unknown was Cassiah. Not even his brothers were here now.

They had however, given him a bit of home to take with him, or a coping mechanism of sorts. Ron glanced quickly around the room to ensure that no one else had arrived yet – not that any of the boys would care, they'd come to expect this after knowing him for so many years – and pulled a mason jar full of weed out of his backpack. It absolutely reeked as he ground it, and he sighed in relief as he packed a bowl and took the first hit. Thank fucking Merlin for Fred and George.

Just then, Seamus entered the room and gave him a huge, sly, smile before hurrying across the room to slap Ron across the back, "Weasley, my man, never wasting time, huh?" Ron passed Seamus the bowl and the lighter and smiled lazily,

"'Ve had a rough go of it today, mate."

Seamus looked at him, puzzled by this confession, but shrugged it off quickly as just another one of Ron's grumpy mood swings. The thing was, as crushed as Ron was about his breakup with Cassiah, hardly any of the guys knew about it yet – it's not like he was going to owl them about it, Jesus – and those who did know about it had no idea that Ron was going through it. It was his decision, so he figured he had no right to bitch and moan about it.

The boys cashed the bowl between the two of them before the other guys came in, all chattering loudly about their summer, and the excitement of the new school year. Ron had honestly been dreading being around all of his friends and having to think about life at Hogwarts without Cassiah, but now that he was significantly higher than he was then, he was happy to see them.

"Ron!" Harry shouted before pulling his friend into a huge bear hug, or as much of a bear hug as someone almost half a foot shorter than he was could give, "Sorry I lost you after the train, I was with-"

"I figured," Ron stammered, not wanting to hear about Harry's reuniting with his little sister because for one, she was his little sister, and more importantly, it was a reminder of how crushingly single he was. "S'alright, then. I'm completely starved though. We should probably head down to the Great Hall for dinner."