Forbidden- A Harry Styles Story

Epilogue-77

Song of the chapter is 'Corduroy Dreams' by Rex Orange County 

-Erin-

I shuffled up Harry's front steps quietly, his mum's old house feeling quaint and empty.

Harry had been let off of work for months. He was in such bad shape with the deaths of his mum and sister that even management couldn't get him to do anything. They had tried to make him do a concert since they died a couple of weeks ago, but he didn't even show up. When Paul went to his house, he found Harry unconscious on the bathroom floor, drunk out of his mind.

Thus the reason I was reaching my hand out to knock on the door of his mum's house. I knew he was home and that it wasn't that late. He should've been awake still, and I was tired of him being reclusive and trying to deal with all of his pain on his own. He needed someone, and if he was pushing even Louis away, I had to step in.

After the incident with Gemma at the hospital, he had pushed me away. He told me he didn't want me there any longer. So I left. I went back to my apartment and sobbed in Cora's arms until I fell asleep and did a line of cocaine at 6 am. And I developed back into the same cycle. Matching Harry's antics and killing my liver and lungs.

I knocked loudly on the door, knowing that he would probably be upstairs. I rang the doorbell as well, making sure he'd hear me so that I wouldn't have to break down the door. Hearing footsteps on the other side of the door, I sighed in content, hoping he'd be at least a little happy to see me. I knew that we still hadn't talked enough about what had happened between us. Zayn and he seemed closer, so I was vaguely wondering why he was forgiving Zayn and not me.

Because Zayn deserves his forgiveness.

You do not.

I shook my head at the voices and looked up, startled when the door opened.  Harry stood in front of me, his long hair a mess on his head, tangled and greasy as if he hadn't washed it for weeks.

"Erin? What are you doing here?" He asked, his voice harsh and raspy. I took a small step back from him, unnerved at how angry he already sounded at me.

"I-I wanted to come check on you. Niall said-"

"Niall is a nosy shit. Go away," he started to close the door, but I stuck my hand out to stop it, making him roll his eyes.

"Just let me in, Curly. I just want to talk,"

"You had your chance to be here for me. But you left. Oh, and you slept with my friend and slept with Kai and Jack. Oh, and you held a gun up to my head and almost got me killed. And let's not forget the lying about your drug addiction. And the alcoholism.  Oh, and the fact that you've been a prostitute this whole time we've been apart. Should I go on?" His voice sounded like Louis's when he found out I had almost hurt Harry. He had ranted at me the exact same way...but this didn't sound like Harry at all. 

With his grief came anger and sarcasm that was unmatched by even me or Louis. I found myself even becoming slightly nervous at the idea of him being full of all this anger and unable to get rid of it. I had always thought he was so happy and charming and surface level, but what he was feeling was so relatable to me that I wanted him to open up. I wanted to hold him and kiss his head as I did so long ago when he had watched Gemma pass. He had instantaneously pushed me away as soon as my lips had hit his skin. It had hurt me, but I held it in as he pushed me away and Louis led me out the door. I was still watching as Louis held Harry tightly as Harry began crying again. It broke my heart, and I left. 

"I-I just know what it feels like to lose a sister and I just wanted to be there for you," I said timidly, watching his face contort in anger.

His eyes softened at the mention of my sister, but they immediately became passive once more.