Into That Wild Blue Yonder

10. So Long, Farewell

Colm sat at the usual table in the rear of the tavern where he could stew in his misery one last time. The servers tried to approach twice, but Colm shot them a resentful look and they skittered off to other patrons. Abelard arrived a time after Colm and took over as the main liaison between the staff and the young grump, keeping the other daytime lunch patrons safe from Colm's downtrodden aura.

"Getting ready to leave, eh?" Abelard asked as he placed Colm's drink on a coaster and slid it over.

"Yep," Colm grumbled. He picked up the glass and took a sip. "What'll you do without me?"

"Heh, I saved up all that gold you tossed on my bar." Abelard took a seat across from Colm and leaned on the table. "I can't really accept it, no matter how much I want to say I should. I'll owe you."

"Buy my contract?" Colm asked in a mildly hopeful tone. Abelard chuckled.

"Ain't no way I'm getting' in THAT woman's way, not even for you," he said. Colm groaned. "Oh, come on, it can't be that bad."

"So you say."

"I didn't get to finish talking to you on account of that turd who came in last night," Abelard said. Colm's ears perked up. "What was his name? Dolt?"

"Dolf," Colm replied with a ghost of a grin. Abelard smiled.

"Whatever his name was. Anyhow, this is going to be an opportunity for you; To expand your horizons, to learn new things you never could've learned before. What's the point of life if you don't live it?"

"What's the point of life if you don't enjoy it?"

"And you've been enjoying this? Really?" Colm grunted and sipped his beer. "Life isn't meant to be this blissful tryst between you and everything you've ever wanted. You don't even know what you want. Wanna know how I know that?"

"How?"

"I didn't know what I wanted when I was in my early twenties. I didn't know when I was twenty-nine. I finally started to know in my thirties, and even then, I barely figured out who I was because I was so concerned with who I wanted to be."

"Can't move forward if you got no idea where to go."

"Can't take the first step in the right direction if you have no idea where you are."

"And just where am I?" Colm asked with mild frustration.

"You stand at a crossroads," Abelard answered authoritatively. "You'll find yourself at many in this life, and every one of them can only be traversed once. You chose one a while ago, if I recall, when you took this strange job of yours."

"Not much of a choice."

"It's all a choice."

"No, it isn't," Colm said, leaning into the table. "I didn't choose to fall down the mountain. I didn't choose for you to find me. It all just happened."

"The choice you made wasn't coming down here. It was once you came down. It was how you continued with the hand you were dealt."

"Enlighten me, what choice did I make?"

"You looked back. You've always looked back. I don't know what you're looking at, because I can't see the road you came down. But you've been so preoccupied looking back at the path behind you at a door that can't reopen that you've missed so many upcoming exits, so many open doors on the side you never bothered to glance into. Now, your path is split, and you can't just blindly walk forward. You have an opportunity."

"An opportunity for what?"

"You can choose to live in the shadow of the past, or you can choose to embrace the unknown."