Adventures in the Boiling Isles

Witches Before Wizards

I woke up to see the spare bedroom in Eda's house. This is all real! I really had to use the bathroom, so I walked in the door to see Hooty. "Hiya, Petey." Hooty greeted as I screamed and kicked him by accident. "Not again, hoot!" "Sorry, Hooty." I apologized. Although it was kinda weird to hear Hooty call me Petey, a nickname only my mom called me.

After I finished getting dressed in the bathroom, I went to the bedroom where I was staying with Luz, who was dressed in an old robe. "What is that?" I asked. "My new uniform fit for an apprentice." Luz replied, bringing me downstairs to wait for Eda. When she came down, she was still in her pajamas. "Good morning, Eda the Owl Lady!" Luz greeted. "We are ready for our first day of witch apprenticeship." "Ugh, who are you again?" She asked with a yawn. Luz gasped. "It's Peter and Luz." I explained. "Remember us? We all freed the oppressed and defeated the evil warden together, yesterday?" "Kid, lay off the details." Eda said. "I haven't even had my cup of apple blood yet." "You mean apple juice?" I asked. "No." She replied, sitting down, drinking her beverage. Luz was still pretty excited about the fact that we were spending time with a witch. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited too, but I'm not acting like I'm meeting some famous author. "Teach us some spells!" Luz begged. "When do we each get a magic staff? Were we supposed to bring our own runes? Do you have a dangerous magical quest for us?!" "Whoa, slow down, kid." Eda explains. "Being a witch doesn't happen overnight, also, you're wrapped in a bathrobe and wearing the dirtiest traffic cone I've ever seen." I took the thing off of Luz's head and blowed away the dust, which did reveal a traffic cone. King began to laugh. "But a magic staff, you really want one?" Eda asked. "More than anything." Luz replied. "Sure, I guess." I added. "Magic staff, come to me!" Eda exclaimed as her staff flies into her hand, but not before it bumps her in the head. "It's early, now, witches are awarded their staffs from school, with me as your teacher, you'll both be taking a different approach, you'll have to work for it. I run a few businesses, on weekends, I offer rare human treasures that Owlbert drags over from your side of the realm, but most days, I sell only the finest homemade elixirs and potions." I picked up one of the bottles. "Snake oil?" I asked. "No one wants an un-oiled snake, follow me." Eda replied, taking us outside. "Today, you'll both be delivering packages and selling potions to that town over there, Bonesborough, you'll have to be careful, I have rivals everywhere who'd love to take my business down and the two of you along with it, you wanted a dangerous magical quest? Kiddos, you've got one." "We won't let you down, Miss Eda." Luz said, accidentally dropping the sack of potions on the ground. "I'm sure." Eda groaned. "Remember, never befriend a man in sandals, and always measure twice, cut once, good luck." Eda slammed the door on us, but we both overheard her telling King that he had to come with us. "Be back by nightfall or risk mortal peril." Eda said, slamming the door again. "Have a nice trip." Hooty added. "Ugh, let's get this over with." King groaned.

Walking into Bonesborough, we saw some creatures walking around town. "Whoa." I whispered. Luz began looking around her surroundings to see the creatures. "Hey, it's rude to stare!" King exclaimed. "I've only seen places like this in my dreams, it's incredible." Luz explains. "And Peter and I are the only humans here?" "Haven't seen any others." King replied. "Do you think there's a reason for that?" I asked. "What if we, Peter Yenkins and Luz Noceda, average teens, actually had a predetermined path of greatness?" "Just like Azura!" Luz gasped. "Yeah, did Azura's path to greatness involve her delivering boil cream?" King asked. "Today, we're delivering packages, but tomorrow we'll be earning the respect of everyone on the Boiling Isles with our magical prowess." I said, determined. "Ha, good luck, the Boiling Isles is nothing but a cesspool of despair." King explains. "More like cesspool of delight." Luz corrected, grabbing me and running off to sell some stuff.

After a few hours of no sales, we stopped at a food cart to get something for King. "I know I've had enough delight for one day." King said. "I thought Peter and I being the only humans in a magical world would make us both special." Luz sighed. "But apparently, it just makes everyone want to scream at us or eat us." I added, getting a creature to stop chewing on my elbow. "At this point, Azura had already been sent on an enchanted quest." "Right?" Luz asked, sarcastically. "Where's our quest-granting wizard?" "Sorry to break it to you, guys, but no one here is that well-dressed." King apologizes. "This has been a rough day." I sighed. "Let's just deliver this last package and go home." "Maybe this world isn't what I thought it..." Luz trailed off by the sight of a castle and gasped. "Oh my god!" I gasped. We walked up to the door and rang the doorbell. "Big houses always belong to big whack jobs." King complained. "Let's kick the package inside and get out of here." "Hello?" Luz asked, running inside. King and I ran inside after her. "We're delivering a package from Miss Eda the Owl Lady." The lights dramatically came on as a wizard stepped out of the shadows. "Today just got good." I gasped silently. "Magical wizard." Luz mumbled. "A weird old man in jim-jams." King said. "Somewhere in between." I added. "I was in my Oscillarium, reading the stars." The wizard explains. "And who might you be, with eyes of curiosity?" Luz and I were speechless. "Young ones, dareth, I say, I sense something unique about you two." He said, making a table and chairs appear. "Please, won't you join me for tea?" "Okay!" Luz exclaimed. "Oh, I'm fine." I replied, standing next to King, who grabbed Luz's hand. "Let's scram, wizards are just old people with glitter in their pockets." King warned. "Yeah, I'm with King on this one, there's something about him that isn't right." I added. "But the stars on his robe are sparkling, and there's a baby fox in his beard." Luz explains. "Plus, I see scones on the table." "Where?!" King and I beamed in excitement. "We'd love to join you for tea." Luz replied. "Not me." I said. "SHOW ME THE SCONES!" "Do you sell potions, sir wizard?" Luz asked, noticing vials of potions nearby. "Please, call me Adegast, and yes, I run a small business." The wizard introduced. "You should run a business of more scones into my mouth." King said. "I'm surprised to see you here, it was my understanding that Eda delivered the packages herself." Adegast said. "Well, we're kinda, sorta, both her apprentices." I explained. "Oh, and how are you finding that experience so far?" He asked. "Can I be honest, Mr Adegast?" Luz sighed. "When both of us decided to stay in this magical world, we both thought we were meant for something special, but, Eda thinks we're meant for chores." "One of the summer camps I was sent to was mostly child labor." I said. "But, what she's trying to say is that we're afraid if we came to the wrong place." "Hmm, I have a quest..." Adegast said. "A quest?!" Luz exclaimed. "You didn't let me finish. I have a question. Would you like to go on a quest?" He asked. "Yes!" She replied. Adegast pulled a scroll out of his beard. "I might have just the thing." He explains. "The prophecy speaks of a young human boy and girl who will claim the Celestial Staff and free this world from an ancient evil. Perhaps thou hath cometh here for a reason. "Perhaps we hath." We mumbled. "Should you believe yourself worthy to attempt this quest..." "So worthy." Luz replied. "Sure, I guess." I added. "You need to know the road is dark and perilous, and only the Chosen Ones can pull the staff from its post." "Neat story, anyway, your food is gone and we are, too." King scoffed. "Yes, we have to go." I said. "And pack for this enchanted quest, I'm in!" Luz added. "Wonderful." Adegast cheered as we left.