Never Been Kissed

It Started With a Snowball Fight

Every other time I've mentioned snow, it's been nothing in comparison to what we've got today.

There have mostly been flurries up until now, but today it's like a storm is brewing.

The cars in the streets are moving slow, slugging through snow mounds under the cold, grey sky and everyone's inside, snuggled up with their loved ones across from a fire- at least that'd how I picture it.

It was Rebecca's idea to go to Central Park. We'd walked to the Barnes' apartment to get some sugar when the idea popped into her head. Usually, we all dismiss her childish ideas, but today? It felt perfect to do just what she'd suggested and we were all for it.

We took Mr. Barnes' Buick to the park because it was too far to walk in the cold. When we were all like this, though, us kids stuffed into the back seat with our parents up at the front having a conversation all their own, it almost felt like a family. A makeshift family.

Mom and Mr. Barnes wiped off a bench and sat together on it, watching us (not really) as we ran around in the empty whiteness the snow provided.

No one else was in sight and it was terrifyingly cold, the snow still continuing to fall in big clumps.

It started with a snowball fight.

It was Bucky's idea.

We hid behind trees and dug tunnels in the snow to sneak up on one another. We built forts and teamed up and climbed trees- all as a means to the same end of winning this snowball fight.

Next, came the snowmen.

All three of us worked to build the perfect man of snow. When we'd finished, using rocks and twigs and things alike to mold his face, I thought of how he'd remain there long past the existence of the surrounding snow. There would come a New York's day in spring with a bright ever-shining sun and baby flowers starting to burst open and tall trees growing greener where a lump of white, icy snow would remain in all of its silver-blue tones amidst the gilded-pink new life upon the grass in Central Park.

Rebecca plopped into the ground and started waving her arms and legs to make a snow angel, so we both joined in. I felt the coldness fill my sleeves and hit the back of my neck. I tried to look over at them, but the snow was so tall and I had sunk so deep into it that I'm sure even passers by wouldn't see us.

Bucky stood first and helped Rebecca up, then helped me up too.

"I'm cold," she said.

"Well, you were just laying in the snow," Bucky laughed.

"Are we going home soon?" she asked. "We can make hot chocolate!"

"We'll go soon, yea," he said. "Go sit between dad and Miss Rogers, they're warm I'm sure."

"But they're talking," she said, hiding behind a tree with the me and Bucky so that we might more easily spy on their conversation.

"Are they..." Bucky squinted.

"Flirting," I filled in his sentence. "Looks like it."

"You've gotta be shitting me," he commented.

"Language!" Rebecca pushed him.

"What she said," we ganged up on him.

"Okay, okay," he put his hands up. "Sorry Becca. Go sit with dad and Miss Rogers, it'll be fine."

"Alright, bye Stevie," she waved at me and walked over to them.

I watched as she interrupted their conversation and they slid over to make room for her in between their bodies. I watched my mom smile and move her golden hair out of her face to push it behind her ear. Mr. Barnes smiled too, helping Rebecca get up onto the bench. Now that I look at him, though, I realize that he's just a more adult Bucky. I wondered in that moment if that's what Bucky will look like when he's in his 40s and if I'll look like my dad would have at 40 if he were still alive.

I was forced back into reality as Bucky pushed me and proceeded to throw a snowball at my head.

"Buck!" I yelled. "What're you doing?"

"Messing with you," he laughed and pushed me again. "What's the matter? Can't take it?"

I pushed him back and dragged my hand through the snow and shoved it into his face. Much to his surprise and mine, he fell straight onto his back. I proceeded to bury him in snow, that is, before he grabbed me and pulled me down with him.

I landed face first into the snow.

When I rolled over to help myself get up, I felt him below me- the only thing that was actually warm out here in this weather was his body beneath mine.

I brought my eyes to his and just felt his chest rise and fall as he breathed.

"You're so... warm," I whispered.

"And they can't see us," he added, making me look over and see that we were so deep into the snow that it didn't even matter what we did. I shivered at the snow surrounding us, as it was finally getting to me. "You cold?"

"A little," I answered. "A lot, I take it back."

He chuckled. "Come closer, then."

His hand reached up and grabbed at my neck, drawing me in closer and filling my body with the warmth he gave me.

My lips met his and it felt like the snow around us had to have been melting. Like, soon, we'd be drowning in cold, runoff snow water in our very own upside down, reverse igloo just kissing and kissing and kissing until the sun went down.

I stuck my fingers underneath his hat and ran my fingers through his hair as I straddled him, wishing we were wearing less clothes even though I was already cold as it was.

I felt him push me away and I moved back, before he threw snow at my face. He started laughing unstoppably, so I shoved some in his mouth.

"Mmm!" he hummed unexpectedly.

I saw something twitch in his eyes as he pulled me closer and kissed me anew with the cold snow having left an icy touch on his lips and tongue.

I felt my body and his start to move slightly, slightly against each other in a way I didn't really know how to explain.

He kissed me harder and dipped his tongue in deeper, only pushing my body ever-closer to his and seemingly subconsciously on my part. His hands quickly moved down my body and pulled me into him, forcing a breath out of my mouth as we parted.

I heard his breath and it was sporadic; my heart was pounding out of my chest and roaring in my ears and-

He pulled away and held my head before his eyes and just looked all across my face. "As much as that feels incredible and I never want you to stop, they're gonna start wondering where the hell we are and Rebecca's gonna wanna head home soon."

"You're right, I know," I agreed, smirking. "I guess we'll just have to continue with this later."