For Better For Worse

4X01:The Toll Of The Bells

 "I love you Dad. We all do. And if there's one thing I wish I could tell you, it's that I am grateful for you because you did your job, so well."

At this point, the entire team had tears in their eyes because Andy's words were true. Despite not being blood related, they all did feel like one big family. A family that lost someone so near and dear to each and every one of them. Without Pruitt Herrera, none of them would be the firefighters they are today. He had such a profound impact on all of their lives and he would forever be missed by them.

Upon finishing the eulogy, she gazed upon her friends, or better put, her family. Their reassuring glances gave her strength to continue on when all she felt like doing was collapsing. It wasn't until she locked eyes with her husband that she felt completely at ease. Despite being seperated, he always knew how to calm her down when she needed him to. She felt as if the last 21 days were a lifetime. She wondered how she would even survive the next 69 days without him by her side. She took a deep breath before stepping aside to take her seat as Maya took her place at the podium. Vic also got up and took her position at the big bell positioned behind her.

"When a firefighter dies, the toll of the bell represents their last alarm. The end of their duties. The bell rings to say their shift is over. They're going home." Maya said, as she tried not to cry over the loss of her captain. She then turned towards Vic and gave a nod that it was time.

*Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding*

The first set of bells echoed throughout the barn. Each member of the team was trying so hard to keep it together. As the bells rang, memories of their once beloved captain flooded throughout all of their minds. Andy on the other hand was struggling to hold on. The memory that flooded her mind was the one when her father rang that same bell for her mother's so called "death". That memory used to make her smile but, now all that came to her mind was lies.

*Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding*

Robert could see the sadness in his wife's eyes from where he stood. He wanted nothing more than to run to her side and be the shoulder for her to cry on but, he knew he couldn't do that. He needed to keep his word and stay away in order to stay clean and sober.

*Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding*

The third set of bells was probably the hardest for Andy to handle. The longer she sat there listening to those damn bells, the more she was breaking on the inside. She felt as if she couldn't breath and that she wouldn't make it all the way through. Her breathing was beginning to quicken and it became very erratic. It didn't go unnoticed by the entire team and she felt the gazes of her teammates eyes on her. She didn't want to be there anymore and she knew she had to leave. Without thinking she stood up and ran out of the barn as the last set of bells echoed throughout the entire station.

*Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding...Ding*

Ben saw his friend run out of the barn and he was about to quietly excuse himself to go follow her. However when he stood up, he was surprised to see Robert standing in one of the doorways. Robert held up his hand and signaled to his friend that he would be the one to speak to his wife. Ben gave a reassuring nod before sitting back down.

* * *

Andy was pacing back and forth just outside the station and was trying to get her breathing under control. She was begging to get dizzy and felt as if she was going to pass out, so she took a seat on the steps leading up to the station. She put her head into her hands and silently cried to herself. This was really happening. Her father was gone and she felt like she didn;t know what to do with herself.

It didn't take long for Robert to find his wife sitting outside on the steps. He knew she would go somewhere where she could be alone and this was the only place considering B shift was scattered throughout the entire station watching the ceremony. When his eyes finally landed her, he felt his heart smash into a million tiny pieces. He paused for a moment to consider his options. Should he walk up to her and risk his sobriety in order to help her? Or does he turn around and let one of the crewmates talk to her instead? The answer to him was obvious. He took a deep breath before making his way over to her.

At this point Andy was crying so loud that she didn't hear him come up behind her. It wasn't until she felt a hand on her shoulder that she realized someone followed her outside. What she didn't expect when she turned around was to see her husband's loving eyes looking down on her. All it took was for him to say "Andy," before she started to cry again. He slowly sat down next to her and held her in his arms as he kissed the top of her head.

Andy cuddled close to him and breathed in his familiar scent. She missed him and she didn't know that this separation would be so hard. She wanted nothing more than to just stay like this with him forever, but she knew she had to pull herself away. Andy sighed as she pulled back to look up at him. "Robert, whatever happened to the 90 day separation?" she asked. He chuckled quietly to himself before saying, "Babe you know you're more important to me than some 90 day seperation." Andy was slightly taken back by his comment. "You said you needed this in order to stay clean, that you needed time for yourself, and that you needed a break from our relationship." He looked down at their intertwined hands before saying, "I know I did, but-" Andy was quick to cut him off. "No buts Robert. We had an agreement and we are supposed to stick to it. You can't run to me everytime something goes wrong. Yes, it's very sweet of you to care for me like that but, you need to take care of yourself too." He nodded his head because he knew she was right.

"Okay, yeah I guess you are right. But-" he began. "Robert no buts" Andy stated. "BUT, I am putting a short pause on the 90 days. I already broke the agreement so, what's another few minutes with my wife who needs me now more than ever." She looked at him with so much love in her eyes. This separation had been hard on her, and she had no doubt it had been hard on him. However, she knew in order for it to work, they needed to actually be separated. But letting Robert comfort her for a few minutes couldn't hurt too much. Right? With one last glance into his eyes she knew the answer as she rested her head and whispered "I miss you."

A few seconds later Robert whispered, "I miss you too, but we'll get through this. And we will be stronger than we were before after it." That was something they both were sure of. The rest of the separation wouldn't be easy, but they would make it through it. They might have to take it a day at a time, but they would make it.