Don't Be Scared

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You groaned, clinging to consciousness by only a thread. You used all your energy to force your eyes open, but it took a second for your eyes to adjust. You were back in the plush room of Diane's home, tucked under the covers. You went to move, but it was like your body wasn't working. Your muscles were too weak, too heavy. You picked up your head but it plopped right back down onto the pillow. You couldn't get up. You couldn't get away.

You whimpered, suddenly overwhelmed with the terror of the position you found yourself in. You felt tears spill out and over your cheeks, unable to wipe them away. You tried to contain your sobs but it was hard as you drew in ragged breaths, your asthma adding to the weight on your chest.

You heard footsteps hurrying down the hall over your labored breathing. You knew it was her. You knew she had heard you. You stared in terror as Diane appeared in doorway and rushed into the room. She sat in a chair that was placed right by the bedside, you just noticing it was there. You wondered how long she sat there, watching you lie unconscious. 

She smiled at you, petting your head like she often did. She laid her head in her arms, propped up on the bed, her nose only inches from yours. She looked at your wordlessly, with admiration in her eyes and you stared back, terror in yours. A tear fell from your eyes and she quickly reached out and wiped it away.

"Are you in pain?" She asked you, concerned. Her hand lingered on your cheek, caressing it with her thumb. You bit your lip and found the strength you needed to speak.

"No, I-Im scared," you croaked. 

Diane's face fell, she looked like she was in physical pain. Tears sprung up in the corner of her eyes, but she forced herself to smile. 

"Wh-why would you be scared darling? I don't want you to be afraid. There's nothing to be afraid of," she whispered, her breath warming your face. You saw her lip quiver a bit and she bit it to stop it. You knew she was starting to lose her cool. 

 "You drugged me and you lied. You lied to me Diane." You let out a sob, the pain in your chest unbearable. Not only were you scared, but you were hurt. You trusted Diane. You genuinely loved her. 

You cried for real now, sobbing like that night on the kitchen floor. Diane sat up, her hands shaking slightly, reaching out for you.

"No no no. Don't cry. Please. I only gave you that because I was afraid you would hyperventilate. And I..." Diane paused, drawing in a breath. You wondered what story she was going to tell you now.

"I only lied to you because I didn't want you to think I couldn't take care of you. I do teach technically, I just substitute for another county. I take jobs when I need them and I know you needed me more."

She still wasn't telling you the truth.

"No Diane! Not just that! You lied about your daughter! You didn't have one, Chloe wasn't real. You tried to take someone's baby. You stalked my friend. You were in-"

"Chloe was real," Diane interrupted. Her voice was stern and serious and it frightened you down to your core.

"Chloe was real. She died in my arms, two hours old. I lost my child, and I lost my will to live. I was discharged like nothing happened. Like I hadn't lost my ENTIRE life in one awful moment. And there in the nursery window was all these healthy, perfect little babies, while mine laid downstairs in the morgue. I looked at them and knew none of their parents could love them as much as I could. I would give them a good life. So I made a mistake. And I paid my dues, I righted my wrongs. That was nearly 20 years ago Y/n, I am not the same person."

You felt like your heart was being pulled apart, confusion the only thing that was real to you anymore. You wanted to trust Diane, you wanted to believe she had just made a mistake, but it still felt like she was hiding something. You could see how she may have been driven to that from heartbreak, but was she remorseful? And what about Mandy?

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