August 15th 2014
The train I took out of Halifax only got me as far as New Jersey. So the hours I spent crushed between an obese man who smelled of basement mold, and a talkative twenty-something blonde bimbo who couldn't seem to grasp the concept of angry death glare, could've been spent in my own car in glorious silence.
"Did it hurt when you pierced your nose? It looks fresh. I really wanted to get that done but of course it would interfere with my job opportunities. At least, that's what BuzzFeed said, and I'd trust that website with my life."
And her agitating high pitched squeaky mom voice followed me until the end of the line. Twelve hours of suppressed angry outbursts really got to me by the end of the trip, so when she asked for my number I felt no shame in snapping her phone in half. In my defense, I said no politely... fourteen times.
By that point I went to the nearest used car dealership, bought their cheapest piece of junk, and floored the pedal all the way to Tampa Bay. By The time I got there, it was three o'clock in the morning. My super secret ID shop was closed, so I had to camp in the rusty old station wagon I picked up in Jersey. It was all good; I slept in a rest stop with a small hunting knife tucked safely beneath my makeshift pillow made of a pile of jeans.
I woke up at around eleven, and decided I should probably go pick up my IDs. That was easy enough, considering the warehouse was only twenty minutes away.
The man who worked there said his name was Barbie, and he asked me a lot of questions. I answered with the same level of sarcasm as I usually do, and he offered me a job with him, saying I'd be a 'sly dog' and a 'good pet'. I have no idea what that means, so for now I'm assuming it was along the lines of paid temporary companionship. No thank you.
The IDs looked realistic enough that I checked into the hotel using them. It felt good to sleep in a real bed. But not just any bed; you see, I find when you spend other people's money, you tend to... over spend. So I bought out the pent suite at the Four Seasons. A little extravagant, but I'd say well deserved.
I'll write more tomorrow, but today was incredibly uneventful, and I am exhausted. Super humans get tired too, you know? Can someone please put that on a bumper sticker? I'll pay for shipping and everything.
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I'm liking this story and so far its coming along nicely. Let me know what you guys think (:
YOU ARE READING
over and over - l.h.
Fanfiction"What's your name?" "...Cora." "How old are you?" Much older thank you think.
