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Prologue

Y/N's POV

I didn't want to get used to this life. I lost my son and my...husband. No one should have to endure this. And I've had to endure so much at once. Every time I close my eyes...I see them both leaving me. Every time. Everywhere I look I see him. I don't know how long I'm gonna be without him but....

Maybe I shouldn't be in Wakanda anymore...

Maybe I need to go back home.

It's been a year. A year since everything happened at once. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about it. I rarely left my bed. I mean, there was no reason to. Who was I going to see? Everyone left. Steve, Nat, Rhodes, Bruce, they all went back home. Nat tried to ask me if I wanted to join her, but I gave her no answer. That was their home, not mine. Come to think of it....I've never really had a home. I moved to Bucharest, then was basically on the run, and now I'm in Wakanda. The only real home I had was...Bucky. Now he's gone. I was laying on my bed, staring up at my ceiling. I then heard some ruckus outside. Yelling and loud noises. It had been silent in Wakanda for so long so curiosity got the best of me and I went to my window. I looked down and saw guards and soldiers in the field. They were working together to try and rebuild what they had lost, but without T'Challa...it seemed like Chaos. I then heard a knock at my door. It made me jump, but someone had knocked on my door twice a day for a almost a year to try and get my attention. It was also a guard trying to get me to eat.

"Y/N....it's Okoye." I heard. I almost sprinted over to the door but hesitated on opening it. What news could she possibly tell me. I began to walk away to my bed.

"Y/N...please..." I heard her say. I turned back to the door and slowly opened it.

"Okoye..." I sighed. She looked just as destroyed as me. She had always acted tough for everyone around her but this time...she was breaking. I engulfed her in a hug and we stayed like that for a bit.

"How are you doing?" I asked her. We pulled apart and she took a deep breath.

"Wakanda is so different now. There's only half of our guards and people are trying to break in and steal things. That is why the guards outside are trying to keep this place safe. It's turning into anarchy....how are you feeling?" She asked me. That's a question I could never answer.

"I don't know....both my son and my...Bucky are gone. I don't know what's left for me here." I shrugged. She knew at this point she couldn't tell me something I didn't already know.

"He was your home." She stated.

"He is....and that was taken from me. I just still feel lost." I said. She nodded. We hugged once more. 

"May this feeling subside." She sighed. We released our embrace and she started to leave me room.

"You need to do what you feel is right for you, Y/N. You cannot sleep on a bed of knives if one is sharper than the other...If you're feeling something...act on it." She said, before shutting my door. I looked back out my window and she was right. I didn't recognize this home anymore. I had to rebuild my life from where I believe it started....and that was when I met Bucky.

I had to leave Wakanda.