The Rewind

Kalel

I hesitate before knocking on the door, I didn't use to knock.. I used to have a key. I knock twice and stand back from the door. Anthony opens immediately scaring me a little.
"hey" he says in a jolly voice
"hey" I say, I feel awkward.. then again I always feel awkward. I tried to dress really casual so he didn't get any wrong ideas. My brown/blond hair was pulled back into a messy bun and I was barley wearing any makeup. I could tell he tried to do the same.. his hair was uneven and his shirt was the old one he had ripped while we were on vacation in Hawaii.
"So.. wanna come in?" he asks smiling
"yea" I walk in and see Pip on the couch sunbathing, he looks up and runs towards me his tail bobbing.
"Hey papa" I say scratching behind his ears and on his chin.
"So shall we begin" Anthony claps his hands and motions towards to chairs set up in front of a camera. I sit down cross legged with my hands in my lap.
Anthony turned on the camera and sits down. I try not to smile when I am around him. Today was no acceptation. We film our video and the entire thing goes by so fast the only thing I can remember is Anthony's hand pressing the off camera. The red light on the camera turns off. I get up and he grabs me into a hug, he holds me tight but not to tight.
"So I'll see you soon?" he smiles and says.
"yeah" I say slowly as I open the door and walk out. I hear the door slam behind me and walk out.
"I better check on the apartment" I think. I had an extra apartment in this building that I kept all my extra stuff in from back when Anthony and I were dating. We had wanted two separate apartments so we could "grow individual before we got married" but it didn't last long because I couldn't stand being away from him and we ended up staying in his apartment every night.
I open the door to my apartment and the smell of fresh flowers circles my face and goes around my body. "Home" I walk over to the dish on my counter and put down the keys. Every thing is Normal here, I look over toward the couch, Anthony and I had opened my birthday present there... I walk over to my dish taking my keys and walking out. The door shuts and I sigh, for some reason I was expecting to see Anthony outside the door... he would always do that to me, he would wait outside the door when I was leaving for class and then yell "Boo! I have to say goodbye!" I walk outside and feel my eyes stink from the "cold" wind it was about 45 degrees which in L.A is when people start doing crazy saying the world is ending. It barley ever gets this cold, but it reminds me back home in Missouri, I can't wait until I go home for the holidays. I miss Missouri terribly and sometimes I want to move back, but then again I love the beach and the warm weather, it's just different. I grew up in a small subdivision with not many kids my own age, I lived back to back with a doughnut shop, which was basically my childhood, up until we moved to a different town when I was in 8th grade, leaving all my friends and my old life behind. I walk into my apartment and plop myself down on the couch sighing. Buki runs to my aid and hops on my stomach.
"Awww mama" I stick my finger out as she sniffs it and rubs her face against it.
"it's okay... we're going to be okay.." I break out into tears and put my head into my hands sobbing.