what universe is this again?

2- waves of change

When Kakashi had said 'duties as shinobi of Konoha'  Kana had hardly suspected that those duties would involve weeding gardens and chasing cats. She knew that everyone had to start at the bottom and work their way up, this just wasn't what she imagined said bottom to be like. It was only a matter of time before Naruto snapped and demanded an "actual" mission, and when he did Kana couldn't find it in her to disagree. And so they got their first C-rank.

It had seemed easy on the surface. Escort the drunkard bridge builder home, maybe knock some sense into a few bandits along the way. But then they had to fight a couple of chunin level missing nin and the truth slowly came unraveled. And then Zabuza, the demon of the hidden mist swooped down and that was when the feeling that they were in way over their heads coursed through Kana's veins like ice water.

She watched Kakashi's passed out form under the covers. His chest rose and fell steadily, so at least he was alive. Even their deceptively skilled teacher had barely been enough to save the mission. If someone else came after them, Kana wasn't sure how they were going to complete this mission.

When Kakashi finally roused from his sleep sometime later the relief that flooded the room was almost palpable. Naruto's warry smile became so much more natural, and even Sasuke sighed. Then, when Kakashi's first words were "Zabuza is not dead" all of that relief came crashing down on their heads. Now they had not only Zabuza to worry about, but the fake hunter nin as well. At least Kakashi was going to teach them something tomorrow, and hopefully it would make them stronger and more fit to face Zabuza again, but Kana didn't dare hold too high a hope. Zabuza was a monster, in all rights of the word. His killing intent had been enough to freeze her shock-still and she still felt a slight tremor in her hands when she recalled it.

The next day found team 7 in a clearing in the woods behind Tazuna's house. Kana watched carefully as Kakashi walked up the tree, nose still in his book like he was doing nothing more unusual than walking down the main street in Konoha.

"This," he explained "is a basic chakra control exercise. By applying chakra in your feet you stick to the tree. Now, you three try."

Naruto eagerly darted to the tree, put one foot on the trunk and was immediately propelled backwards by the following explosion. Bark pieces and dirt were blown into the audience's faces, Kana quickly reaching her hands upward to shield her eyes. Once a few seconds passed and the air had settled she looked up, blinking away some stray particles as she felt her eyes wetting. Kakashi explained to Naruto that in his excitement he had overloaded his feet with too much chakra and instead of sticking he had been repelled. There was a footprint embedded deep in the trunk, chips of wood sticking up and laying on the ground directly beneath. Naruto chuckled sheepishly, and Kakashi directed him to another tree to try, this time with less chakra.

Kana sets her sights on another tree and steps on the trunk with one foot, trying to make chakra connect it. She lifts her other foot, intent on placing it a bit higher up on the tree and take a step forward, but she slips and with a yelp lands on her ass at the root on the tree. Kakashi comes up behind her, smiling infuriatingly. Kana shoots him one of her own smiles, polite and empty and prays to the Sage that Kakashi will say something actually useful.

"I understand you are afraid of repeating Naruto's mistake," he begins "but seeing as your chakra reserves are much smaller, you need to push more chakra into it." Kana feels mildly insulted at the way he so casually called her chakra reserves small, but the words also reassure her that she won't be a repeat of Naruto's exploding failure. Kakashi baffles her, in his lazy ways but his sharp battle focus, in his provocations laced with good advice, the way he hides not only his face but his emotions under a mask of dry amusement. She has yet to figure out how she actually feels about her teacher. Shaking off those thoughts she bows her head and turns back to the tree.

Half the day passes by in a blur of running and manipulating chakra and hearing Naruto's victorious shouts every time he comes a little further, before Kana finally makes it up the tree. She is surprised that she made it before Sasuke, who is the rookie of the year after all, but then she remembers that it is easier to control a smaller amount of chakra and she sighs, swearing to do something about increasing hers in the future. She is ahead of her teammates here, but only because in another sense she is painfully behind.

Because she was done, Kakashi told her to come to the bride with him and guard Tazuna. It was dull work, considering that Zabuza was according to Kakashi still incapitated. Standing in the harsh sun, without the cover of trees was making her sweat and her clothes were itching. Kana dipped her hand in the water and put it on the back of her neck, sighing at the cool feeling.

"Having fun?" Kakashi's voice from behind scared her into stumbling towards the edge of the water, barely catching herself before she fell into the shallow part facefirst.

"It isn't a good thing for a shinobi to be so easily surprised," Kakashi admonished. Kana smiled wryly, retorting "Kakashi-sensei you are a jounin. If you want to surprise me you are going to be able to easily."

"Maa, I suppose that is true."

"So, what did you come over here for?" Kakashi hadn't pulled out his book yet, so she assumed he wanted words with her.

"How perceptive," he eyesmiled, but beyond the compliment he didn't answer Kana's question. A bout of silence stretched on, until Kakashi finally spoke again. It wasn't the answer she had asked for though, but another question.

"What is your dream?" The question surprised her, but she tried to not let it show. Kana reminded him that she had already told him this on their first meeting, though she doubted that he had actually forgotten it. This felt like a test. The feeling only intensified when he pressed on, asking why that was her dream.

"Because it should be the aspiration for every shinobi..? To become strong" She answered, suddenly unsure of her answer. What was it Kakashi wanted from her? Kakashi sighed and sat down at the riverbank, motioning for her to sit beside him.

"To become strong for the sake of being strong is all well and good," he began, "but it lacks substance. I had a feeling when I saw you, and being your teacher and seeing you work and train it has only grown. You are without passion for what you are doing, aren't you?" Kana's smile slipped from her face. She wanted to shift away from Kakashi, because she was almost afraid of how easily the man saw through her. It was true. She was only a ninja because of her clan, after all. Because she felt indebted to every kind word, every scrap of attention. It went unsaid, but from the start the Sarutobi clan had assumed she would become a ninja, and she couldn't find it in herself to say no. Not after they took her in.

"W-why would you..?" Her eyes were wide, focused on Kakashi's every miniscule movement trying to read his body language.

"Everyone knows Sasuke's circumstances, and Naruto is.. well, Naruto is. But you, less so. So I looked into it a bit. And by then it was easy to put the pieces together. I am worried about you, you know. The boys both have strong wills, but you lack conviction Kana-chan." Kana bristles at his words.

"Who are you to judge me?! Ok fine, maybe I never truly wanted to be a ninja. But I'm here, aren't I. What am I supposed to do about that?"

"You misunderstand me. I'm not telling you to quit being a ninja, or questioning your skills. I just want to show you that being a ninja is more than strength. It is about finding something to protect," Kakashi looked out over the river wistfully. By the end it barely even sounded like he was here, talking to Kana. Instead, he must be imagining some faraway place and time that she didn't understand. Her teacher looked sad.

She was about to ask him about it when Tazuna's voice cut in from above them. "We are having lunch! My daughter brought for you lot too," then, under his breath he grumbled something indistinguishable about sake. Kana jumped at the chance of avoiding more awkward conversation with Kakashi. He might be a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield, but socially he was far worse off. "Yes, we're coming!"

Kana thought about what Kakashi had told her that night. She laid awake, unable to sleep. What did it matter, why she fought? If she fought, then she was giving it her all, and it didn't matter if she actually wanted to be there or not, she had alway reasoned. Something to protect, that was obviously Konoha. But the way he spoke.. It was something more, something she was missing.