dear emily,
Last night, I found myself lying down on my uncomfortable bed - crying. I didn't know why at first but then I remembered you
Years being without you? It feels like I'm already dying in the inside.
I miss you, baby.
It feels so cold without you.
I feel so empty without you. yo
I will forever hate my father for sending me off to this kind of job. I know it's an honor to protect people but sometimes, I think of giving up.
The thought of dying scares me. Because I know, that when I die, my family will be devasted about it, especially you.
All of the people here keeps on telling me "don't be afraid to die, because we all die, we expect that to happen, we don't live forever."
Well, that just makes me want to tug all my hair out. That is pretty fucked up, right?
Like what happened two days ago, we were supposed to be asleep because we have to move out again, but I just couldn't sleep. I was crying, I was shaking.
The seargant saw me. All he did was pat my back and told me that this will be over soon.
But I know that soon will be so long.
I just want to go home and be with you, Emily.
Is that too much to ask?
yours, luke.
