this message may be offensive
i fucjing hate him so much he is the reason why im feeling this way, i don't like it i wish i just stayed in denial and never told anyone my feelings and just let it fade away but i literally cannot handle that bcs i would just cry if my friend actually started to like him hes a fucking piece of shit why do i like him i hate his face and everything that makes him who he is i was better off not recognising my feelings despite the heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach and the fake laughter when I ship him with anyone else, the overthinking at night about why I feel like that, the cursing of myself and my stupid emotions, i fucking hate his friend just as much as him for making me delusional and for not fucking specifying anything i swear im gonna block everyone and kill myself, i cannot believe he made me type this long ass paragraph when he doesn't even deserve something such as this yet i'm still continuing to type. i hate every fiber of my body that is "in love" with him, but im not even in love bcs hes a waste of space in my mind.
