Hi, I read your story. And I couldn't help compare it to my life. You see, I've heard so many fairy tales of knights in shining armors come to rescue their love.
Well I... I've had a hard time with love, heck I'm afraid of it. You see my mom had a hard time with finding love I won't go into details, but I can tell you this. She had an abusive childhood mentally and physically. Then she had to take care of her children... All on her own. Because my dad was lazy, and I love my dad. But sometimes I can't help to hate that he did that to HER to US.
She is now remarried and I have more siblings to love and protect from the world around us. I was once naive, I didn't know the ways of the world until I stubbled on my mom's diary. She was going to throw it away, but being the curious person I was. I read it, and found the truth of so many things. That my life was a LIE.
I never knew why they divorced, until I read they diary. I finally woke up to smell the flowers and realized my world wasn't perfect it wasn't even in the beginning. I soon grew in depression and I still am, but I'm still trying to find a way out. Even after when my cousin died from a broken heart. You see he loved someone but they didn't love him in return, his life was a mess when he was young and that took the cake. I loved my cousin and looked up to him and finding out that... That he... Killed himself, was a heart break and they said he died naturally. But my other cousin told me he didn't, I asked my mom this hoping it wasn't true. But I was wrong.
So you see I'm afraid that I'll get hurt by unintentionaly loving someone who would break my heart.
I was searching for answers that my mom didn't have until I stumbled upon this. Finding out that I'm not alone of how I feel is, a blessing.
I thank you for writing this story.
THANK YOU.
