@BokutoIsMyLife
THEME RAHHHH >>>>
[ @TeallahWonder ] >> I GOT THE WHOLE THEME >> (I even have a car and tree emoji around one of the quotes in my bio.. WHICH THE QUOTES ARE ALSO THEMED MUHAHAHA)
Sometimes I don’t feel like a boy. Like I want to be a boy and I know I’m a boy but sometimes it feels like people around me don’t view me as one. They call me a boy and call me Noah but the thought that they just might not view me as a boy drives me crazy :/
@TeallahWonder awhhh im sorry if you also go through this and just so you know I also see u as a very handsome and kind boy and I’m also very very glad to have you <3
[ @BokutoIsMyLife ] >> I understand this to a very deep level, dude.. I don't really know how to help get rid of those thoughts, I think it just comes with dysphoria and anxiety that comes along with being trans. >> But if it makes you feel any better, I myself genuinely view you as a boy, Noah. You're the most amazing and handsome and pretty boy I've met and I'm so super happy to have you as an older brother figure for me <3333
tw// self harm ig?
2 years of being clean gone. im so dissapointed. i hate having to keep begging my friends not to off themselves, make themselves throw up, and harm themselves in general. I love them so much but its exhausting how i can never stop them or convince them not to. i feel so useless only being able to sit there and cry begging them not to and them just saying "sorry" and leaving me worried. im so tired and i want them to be okay
@TeallahWonder yrvshrbrhb u don’t need to worry abt me I’m doing okay ish now ^^ I still have a few episodes here and there but I just didn’t rlly have anyone to rely on for a while but now I’m doing okay sorry to worry you. I get you are busy so don’t worry abt it if u can’t talk to me or anything but it’s always nice to talk with u every once in a while, love u too /pl <33
[ @BokutoIsMyLife ] >> Noah, I feel your pain and I just want to say I am so f^cking sorry. You shouldn't have to worry about other people's problems so much especially when you already have your own problems.. and you're still young, you shouldn't have to have these worries and thoughts and I am so sorry. >> I'm so sorry you felt so had enough that you had to do that and I apologise for not checking up on you more often as your friend. If I could take all of your pain away I totally would, Noah. I care about and love you so much. /pl >> All of your feelings about this stuff if valid, and it's okay to not be okay. This type of stuff is traumatic and straining, especially the younger you are. >> Even if you aren't 'clean' anymore, I'm so proud of you for having reached 2 years in the first place. You can definitely manage to do it again, even if it takes a bit.
NOAHHHHHH UGHHHUGH
I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T MSGED IN A WHILE MY DISCORD IS F^CKED UP UGHHH
I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL OH YEAH PLEASE REMEMBER TO DRINK WATER AND EAT A HEALTHY AMOUNT OF FOODDDD AND GET SLEEP TOO OR IMA BEAT YOU UPPPPPP (not really *hugs*)
ILYSM?!?!?!! /pl
@TeallahWonder AGH HIII ITS FINE <33 IVE BEEN DOING PRETTY OKAY I HOPE YOU ARE DOING GOOD TOO AND ILY TOO <3
TW// mentions of self harm/suicide
I hate how Wilbur was the reason a was able to stop overworking myself and sleeping constantly to avoid my problems. Now he is my problems and Im already relapsing towards these behaviors. I spent most of my school day trying not to cry once home I stayed on the floor for about 2 hours crying and struggling to breathe and trying not to throw up. I hate him for what he did but he got me out of a dark place in life and this made it feel like he just kicked me back into my depression. I’m scared I’m gonna do something to myself. I just wanna sleep
[ @BokutoIsMyLife ] >> I'm so sorry, Noah. I know it's hard and that you admired Wilbur a lot, I did too. It's awful what we did, but we cannot choose his actions or take back what has already been done. It is not your fault it happened, or that you looked up to his public figure. >> I care about you a lot, and I don't want you to end up doing anything to yourself. I promise I am here for you and I care about you so so f^cking much dude. Please drink some water and try to stay around someone you trust even remotely for a while when you can. >> I love you, I'll try to message you after school ❤
I’ve taken down all my ycgma paintings I’ve made over the years because it’s an album that kept me alive for this long. I couldn’t bring myself to look at them anymore. There was a painting and photo of the album on my wall as well and a bigger unfinished one and a finished msr one
im genuinely so fucking disappointed, disgusted, and distraught with what Wilbur is. What he gave was not a fucking apology he made it all about himself and didnt get to the fucking apology until the end. I never watched shelby or heard of her until this situation but i feel so fucking bad for her. No one should have to go through this so let's make that fucking clear. Im so distraught of what has happened i just wanna lay down and cry. This man has given me comfort with his music and now i feel disgusted to have felt that way. i dont support him or what he has done. fuck him.
[ @BokutoIsMyLife ] >> I feel you Noah. Genuinely sick to my stomach over all of this... >> I hope you're doing okay, sending bunches of hugs ❤
FJSJJCJDKDKD HIII NOAAHHHHH :3
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE I LOVE YOU ALLLL <3334
Currently feeling kinda sad bc in my last class I was just kinda sitting there with my head down and this other boy was trying to get my attention but didn’t know my name ( I have a bad habit of ignoring ppl at first if I’m not prepared to talk) and he asked the boy next to me what my name was (I still had my head down) and the boy next to me told the other boy my name was Noah and the other boy laughed and said “why would they name her that”
Gonna go cry in my closet now bc I’ve felt okay with my gender and name up until now
@TeallahWonder I would probably say he didn’t know but we sit together in like 5 other classes so I found it frustrating. He also said something else about my deadname (don’t wanna saw tbh) and kept making comments on it for the whole class it drove me crazy
[ @BokutoIsMyLife ] >> If he didn't even know your name, he might honestly not have known! However, it's bad to assume pronouns based off appearance either way so he was being careless and ignorant. >> You're a really nice and pretty boy, Noah! I'm sorry you're feeling down about what some jerk at school did. I love you so so somucucuhh and I'm proud of you for feeling good about being open with your gender and name and glad that you at least were feeling confident with them! (Not that you shouldn't still)
Guys I’m finally watching banana fish (it’s an anime I’ve been putting off for a while bc it’s sad) and I don’t think I’m gonna recover from this. I’m already on the 23rd episode I think? My eyes are all red from crying lol