Pulchritudinous7

I just wanted to update you guys & let you know it may be a bit longer before I can update. 
          
          Things arent going well & I'm not fairing any better. 
          
          Despite how I seem, I'm not okay. 
          
          I am no where near being even in the near vicinity of being okay. 
          
          I am in the deepspace of not being okay.
          
          Everyday I struggle to hold myself together & everyday I fail.
          
          I am only still doing what little I am doing because I have something to take care of that doesn't judge me & doesn't make me feel like shit when I don't or can't make that 100% effort & even comforts me when I break down. 
          
          Yeah, it's a stupid cat, but it's my BABY & the only thing that's held me together past couple of years.
          
          I have been struggling for so long, I don't remember a time when I wasn't. I don't remember a time when I was genuinely happy or felt excited for anything. Things that used to bring comfort to me when I struggled, no longer do, I have no desire to go anywhere or do anything, I will literally just go a few days without eating because I just dont have the desire to eat & every time I wake up from what little sleep I can get, my only thought is why. 
          
          I am broken in more ways than I thought possible.
          
          I wonder if people actually knew how long I've been standing on that ledge, just waiting for the wind the shift just right to help me fall off, what would they say this time? 
          
          Knowing how people are, probably the same things they've been saying, since you have to care about someone to care about whether they're gonna stick around or not.
          
          I'm needing to find a place to stay soon & having only been working at this new place for a month, I can't afford anything & people who said they'd help me, arent. 
          
          I'm doing what I can, I promise. 
          I'm sorry for being so disappointing. 
          
          I don't wanna give this up... 
          
          Please wait for me. 
          
          Thank you. 

Greetings & salvation.
          
          I hope you all had a good holiday season. 
          
          I will be posting again within the next few months. 
          
          I've just been through a lot & couldn't do anything about my situation. I was sick for a while & homeless for a until recently.
          
          I am back in Texas now & have started a job & I'm trying to catch up on months of behind bills. 
          
          I'm hoping things look up soon but I don't have expectations that it will considering how my life has been the past year. 
          
          I'm sorry to those who thought I'd abandoned my stories. 
          
          I did not. I was just unable to write or post. 
          
          I'm going to wrap up Lover Boy soon & post more of the dark stories. 
          
          I'm struggling to pick another story to start after Lover Boy. 
          
          I may do a few short stories. I'll have to see how things end up. 
          
          I thank you all for your continued patience. 
          
          BORAHAE

Heyy, you haven’t been active for a while here. Just checking and hoping everything’s good!!

Hoping all is well with you @borahae7souls

***NOTICE***
          
          My chromebook bit the dust months ago & I've been using my cell phone to write.
          
          But not that too has wrecked itself after an update. 
          (Keeps telling me my sim is not inserted. It is...)
          
          And since I am a broke as shit, I'm going to have to find a way to get another one but it may take me a while. I'm currently using an old phone & just by unlocking the screen, the battery percentage literally dropped 3%. (Meaning the old phone is ass & it also is too old to run my apps properly.)
          
          I am currently on my broken phone, using wifi to post this since I cannot access my mobile data. 
          
          This may put a longer wait for my next chapter, as I'll have to transfer all my notes & stories over to the new device. 
          
          I apologize for this & I hope you can continue to have patience with me while I attempt to fix this. 
          
          Thank you. 

Just a note to readers...
          
          Do not comment on novels with comments asking for updates. Especially when, if you actually read everything to the bottom & see the author is going through struggles.
          
          It's quite frankly rude & honestly shows that you care more for the words in a fantasy novel than the mental, emotional & physical health of the person who's writing the words in real life. 
          
          Be respectful to the author, whomever they are & wait.
          
          If you can't, you can move on. 
          
          I am still dealing with things (just got back from TX from a funeral for fucks sake) & struggling to make ends meet. I am up, trying to get dressed for work for a 12 hour shift after getting about 2 hours of sleep after doing my PT second job... 
          
          Shit is hard these days & bring impatient with authors who are struggling only serves to make things even harder for them.
          
          Authors are not obligated to update just because you think you deserve it. 
          
          

Hope you all are doing well & had a good X-Mas. 
          
          I am recovering from being sick for the past week.
          (Had started off with just allergies that quickly became a sinus infection, then caught a cold that developed into an upper respiratory infection, so yeah. With my asthma, oh boy...  I felt like I was dying. Lol)
          
          I WILL BE POSTING AGAIN SOON. 
          
          I just needed some time to me. I haven't been in the best place mentally/emotionally (nor physically cause I keep getting sick..) & I've been losing interest in things I used to love, writing included. 
          
          It's hard to write good things when you don't feel an ounce of anything positive & it's hard to write period when all you wanna do is lay in the dark & not exist. 
          
          I'm feeling a bit better now that I've talked to someone,  so I've already started writing a few things. I'm trying to finish Lover Boy for you guys, so it may be a while before I post another chapter of that one because I want to have it almost finished before I post another chapter, just in case I spiral again so you guys will still have content, even if I'm not writing. 
          
          I do have some short stories to post, so I'll probably upload those for you guys, but considering my mental state, they aren't nice..
          
          I want to say that I appreciate you guys being patient with me during these times. It's hard for me because I don't know many people IRL, just the friend I live with & like maybe a couple of others & all my other friends are states away..
          
          I'm taking a trip back to Texas soon to visit family & friends so I'm hoping this will help alleviate some of this loneliness that's been weighing down on my soul. 
          
          I hope you are all okay & staying warm out there!
          
          I love you guys! 
          
          BORAHAE

Happy New Year author-nim  Hope you find your way back this year.

Apologies for disappearing...
          
          
          Like gave me a twisted path & I got lost.
          I'm still lost but I'm finding my way back, I think 
          It's not gonna be easy cause I'm not in a good place yet & the recent stuff that happened really made me pull back & fall into a very dark place & I'm still reeling from it, tbh.
          
          Posted a new book with re-uploads since one of my book & all the stories disappeared too... 
          
          Also... A new short story for y'all. 
          
          I hope you all are doing well. 
          
          Thank you for waiting with me.
          
          Borahae

Hey. Hope you are doing fine. 
          Stay safe. Be healthy.