ChloroformGospel

Cronus sits cross legged under a tree with his attention focused up within the colorful clouds above from the dream bubbles. Though he's been dead for decades now, it seems he's at peace with himself, though a bit of sadness strikes his features as his thoughts wander to all of his past friends in his doomed timeline, wishing the best of luck to whoever is still alive out there beyond these dreams. With a sigh, he closes his milky colored eyes, leaning his head on the rough bark of the tree, enjoying the slight breeze in his little slice of paradise. 

ChloroformGospel

Cronus sits cross legged under a tree with his attention focused up within the colorful clouds above from the dream bubbles. Though he's been dead for decades now, it seems he's at peace with himself, though a bit of sadness strikes his features as his thoughts wander to all of his past friends in his doomed timeline, wishing the best of luck to whoever is still alive out there beyond these dreams. With a sigh, he closes his milky colored eyes, leaning his head on the rough bark of the tree, enjoying the slight breeze in his little slice of paradise. 

carcinoGarrulous

I hope you are well, dearie. I have been thinking about you often, believe it or not. I know that so so so much is happening in your life right now and I have no place to vent on here but I have just been so worried. I really have no idea why.
          To cut this short, I hope you are hanging on. 
          ~Kankri

carcinoGarrulous

@carcinoGarrulous oh im so happy youre alright!!! dont worry about it, take your time! <3
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ChloroformGospel

this message may be offensive
@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            Hey man, thanks for checking up on me. Honestly there's a ton of shit going on and I had lost all motivation in writing because of it. I'm gonna try and get back into the groove soon though! Don't worry about me Chief, I'm doing the best I can nowadays. 
            
            -Cronus 
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ChloroformGospel

Wvell imma pass out early tonight. Surprisingly haha- 

ChloroformGospel

@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            // Amazing and refreshed, I have a little extra energy for today. I slept all night without any nightmares!! This new med really works well, thank you for asking my friend. :-)
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carcinoGarrulous

@ChloroformGospel 
            ~
            ((how does it feel to get sleep for the first time in your life (b^_^)b
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ChloroformGospel

*Places a cigarette between his lips and finger guns with a wink* Ayeee~ My stomach fuckin' hurtsss~

carcinoGarrulous

@ChloroformGospel 
            ~
            n9, i have 6een t9ld the same thing many times. i shall st9p f9r a little 6it, d9nt w9rry
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carcinoGarrulous

@ChloroformGospel 
            ~
            Every9ne can talk, Cr9nus. Well,, excuse Kurl9z. 
            Anyways, are y9u impl9ring me t9 st9p talking? I will d9 as y9u ask if thats what y9u desire.
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ChloroformGospel

@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            No no no- That's not wvhat I meant! Please don't stop. Just... Tone it dowvn a bit? ... You knowv wvhat, do wvhatevwer ya wvant Kanny. I don't havwe no place to judge ya like that. 
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ChloroformGospel

°°°MENTAL HEALTH UPDATE°°°
          
          I'll be honest with you guys, my life isn't perfect. I am an adult with adult problems in adult situations. It sucks. Adulting sucks. Life sucks. 
          
          My mental health has taken an all time low and sometimes I contemplate my worth to this world, which isn't much. I try to keep a smile on my face for my friends and family, but it's been slipping here lately. And I'm sorry for the people who see that. This new year has the worst start and hopefully doesn't get worse, which it probably will considering my situation. But I am taking my HAND FULL of medication and need more blood work done for further diagnosis's... Clinically I have Major Depressive Disorder, Anxiety, and Psychotic Disorder... They are looking more into BPD and Schizo-Dissociative Disorder (Which my dad had before he passed) but that's not official so I'm not going to diagnose myself. I hate all of these medications, the extensive therapy, ALL of it. 
          
          I just wish I were normal. A normal mother who can take care of her growing grub, a wife who can treat her lover better than he is being treated right now. I blame myself for a lot of things. I know my mental health isn't exactly my fault. I've had an abusive childhood, home life, and both of my bio parents were mentally ill and had problems themselves, but then again, my happiness can only be achieved by myself. I need to get out of the past and start a new leaf. With my family that I love so dearly and support me even know I'm a crazy b*tch most of the time. 
          
          2021 will be my year. And I am determined to make myself a better person. Even if it kills me. Wish me luck. <3
          
          - KannySenpai

ChloroformGospel

@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            Awe- I don't know what to say to that.. <3
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carcinoGarrulous

@ChloroformGospel 
            ~
            I should honestly be thanking you for giving me something to care about.
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ChloroformGospel

this message may be offensive
@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            You're not selfish at all!! Thank you for those kind words, it almost made me cry.. I also have to realize that I'm not the only one in the world that have these problems/medications to take. I guess that's me being selfish lol. But it is embarrassing. Some people tend to brag on this site about their mental health but fuck, I just sit back and wonder how. 
            
            And yes! Omfg I really needed to read that. Im trying my best, even though I have a lot of setbacks. Some people don't see that. I just want a normal life with my daughter. She'll be turning 2 this year and I hate her seeing me have my breakdowns, but she is my comfort, my saving grace, my whole world. I'm trying for her and for myself. That's all I can do. 
            
            But really... I appreciate you so much, you don't even know. I hope you're doing okay or at least the best you can. <3
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ChloroformGospel

this message may be offensive
Cronus sighs as he fishes a cigarette and lighter from his black jacket. He simply places the stick between his lips and lights it, taking in the smoke before it flaring out of his nose and gills. He seems to be in thought as a serious expression lingered on his solemn features, staring out the window and watching the rain pour down outside. "Wvhat the fuck did I do to deservwe this treatment." He muttered to himself as he took in another inhale of harmful smoke for his lungs to feed on.

ChloroformGospel

Wvho needs sleep? Not me haha- *Cronus rubs his eyes tiredly* 

ChloroformGospel

@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            //don't be embarrassed please! Wattpad is just blotchy and such
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carcinoGarrulous

@ChloroformGospel 
            ~
            ((IM SO INSANELY EMBARRASSED IM SO SORRY))
            
            Sweet dreams, Cr9nus
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ChloroformGospel

@carcinoGarrulous 
            
            // I was wondering why I was seeing double haha, you're good! 
            
            Alright. Night Kan. 
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