Matthew Webber

Matthew started his career in the mid sixties as a samurai-for-hire in the mean streets of Saskatoon. In the early seventies, he moved to Montreal where he battled the forces of the Khmer Rouge, the Viet Kong and Mary Kay. During this time, he was also closely associated with the Black Power movement where he served as the token whitey. 

He disappeared for a few years into the underground streetfighting scene utilizing his purple-nurple skills to deadly effect. When he resurfaced, he had taken the alias Kelly Elizabeth Finklestien, and appeared as an extra on both Miama Vice, ALF and Punky Brewster. 

After fronting 'Sled-Dog Afterbirth', a grunge/zydeco fusion band out of Yellowknife, he moved to Ottawa where he raised Venezuelan hairless llamas and learned to play the thereminvox. There are unconfirmed reports that he spent some time in northern Manitoba, possibly working for the clandestine Department H as the vigilante-by-night known as the 'Rink Rat'. Nowadays, he is semi-retired and living in the Maritimes where he is highhandedly wiping out the last of Newfoundland's great cod stock one beer'n batter special at a time.