Jayy Morris

It is I, Jake from State Farm! Back at it again with the white vans! No, not really, but my as mommy always said, "Boy, shut the hell up" Wait, no, oh yeah, "You can be whatever you want to be...when you're eighteen so hospital bills don't show up on my door step"

Anyhoe, I am also a very talented singer, dancer, professional coddler, artist (also graphic artist), chicken sexer, photographer, high class chef, and I've been offered a few jobs in pet food testing in my past time. And I'm still single asf.

Why, yes once I was paid to cry at a funeral. I mean, let's be honest, the guy was a d*ck. 

I am currently taking the class 'Mastering the Art of Upskirting 5'. I failed so many times just so I could retake the course and I always felt the need to put my name as 'Irelly Musketback Hoam'

Violent ticklers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the paw with more benefits than friends wait, waitfull-beers, Yoshies are at large! Omg! However, preparation for friendly razor blades on this that hippi-mobile as only through divergence is the key in the ghetto human race of nearly extinct hooker trails.

The reason I have decided on your left butt cheek (the fresh one) is clearly to strife love dominant sex positions rascal shrimpy hair dye nail clippings on a planet far, far away into your life hole :))

~what the heck did I just read?! Ask me about the Tantrum Story Challenge~

If you can say 'Irish wristwatch' three times or follow @ProjectHeWrites  and @GuildofGraphics then we can be friends! xD (check out my website for more cray cray randomness)