Hiya,
In September of 2022, I received a phone call that really made every fiber of my being dissolve into bitter despair. My Mom had a difficult time overcoming her own personal battles and went into liver failure. I numbed alot of that grief in the same way my mother put herself into her condition. I did write a lot during the time but didn't really share anything that I created other than my friends on Discord.
Last September, after discovering a well fair check went out to my mom's, a traumatic event occurred that left her hospitalized, and later discovered my Stepfather passed due to a head injury from falling.
I ended up needing to take a leave of absence from work as I began to have terrifying episodes exacerbated by my ADHD and PTSD, and now I understand the true meaning of having a Panic Attack.
The school district I worked for did not have my best interests at heart and I made the hardest decision in leaving the district entirely while contemplating if I wanted to continue teaching.
I experienced a very scary spiritual attack and never thought I would fall to my knees and run quickly back into the faith that I walked away so easily from years ago. I never picked up a Bible so freely and dived in, but God calls to all of us in some form of way. We just have to listen.
I am grateful to make things right with my Mom, getting her a rosary to pray with. Letting her know that Jesus was coming to get her, all she had to do was ask even though she didn't live with the best decisions, he will take you home. She told me, "I will live forever." In January, she passed. It's hard to think she is gone, but I know Jesus took her because he answered the one request I begged and sobbed for. Please take her peacefully, and he took in her sleep.
I'm sober in many ways. I'm working again. I love visiting Jesus's house. I feel in my heart I should pick up writing again, and Jesus is telling me its okay, but be mindful of where it takes you.
xoxo
