You know, I'm not sure what I'm doing anymore, I go through life doing what I can, I'm polite to all of those I meet, I stand my ground when I need to, I do what needs to get done, or what I want to do, but it never seems to be enough to those I know, they seem to except more and more from me, and when I ask for something, they never return the favor. Today, I thought about what would I do if held at gunpoint, and I thought about grabbing the barrel of that shooters gun, and putting it to my head, I have these thoughts often, but I cant say anything to anyone because i don't want to worry them, or make them feel bad for me, or make them pity me, I'm just not sure what to do anymore, and I could use some help, but I can't bring myself to tell any family or friends, or even my own girlfriend whose almost always there for me, I just don't know what to do.