Hi there, and welcome to Wattpad's official Walmart! 

Please bear witness that all of our products (stories) are absolute trash, no matter which branch you enter.

Keep in mind that you may encounter very confusing and/or confused individuals here at Walmart. Do not panic.

Instead, grab onto your nearest Walmart employee for dear life all while screaming as loud as is humanly possible.

For easy access to important things scattered around the store, they shall be mentioned here:

•Assortment of Bibles - Aisle 666

•Condoms - Aisle 69

•Holy Water - Aisle 13

•Bleach - Aisle 420

•Dying Goldfish - Aisle 911

Please, feel free to try to build forts and live amongst packages of toilet paper for as long as your heart desires.

We encourage everyone to visit your local Walmart today and make yourself at home in the pickled and canned foods section.

Have a Wal-nderful day and remember to shop till you drop!
  • Wherever Your Nearest Walmart Is
  • JoinedJuly 28, 2017

Last Message
TheOfficialWalmart TheOfficialWalmart Jul 06, 2019 07:30PM
I ain't dead, folks lmao. Just inactive and lazy af and I don't think that's changing anytime soon. Hope your summer's going great so far, stay hydrated (we've got a sale on bottled water this week...
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