mashitahaminah
this message may be offensive
I was back again and I didn't want to write this in “mashitah's talk” because it will be hard proses if I want to delete that chapter because I'm afraid someone spilled it to anyone else. So the thing is I feel so miserable lately and I feel like I'm so sick of this kind of shit. Honestly, I was so hurt and you couldn't see it? Why am I am the only one who always tries hard in our relationship? Why am I am the only one who is so desperate to make you feel better if you feeling sad even if it's not my fault? I say sorry all if the time and yet you just shrugged it off like you didn't do any mistake. I feel so disappointed. Is it that hard to say "I am sorry if I hurt you" oh wait you didn't even fucking ask me "Are you okay?". Yeah, I've hurt because of you in 1001 ways. I was so fucking annoying, stupid and ugly and yet you still friend with me. I always hurt you and you hate it. So I'll change and this time is really not a joke as you can see it but if you are blind then I am sorry. I want to show you that I can survive without you. I am a person who has social issues. I didn't know how to treat someone right and etc. I wish our relationship getting better and stronger. I wish everything was right. I wish everything is back just like the old days we spend together. I thought we are a so fucking great best friend but I was wrong. That secret making us tore apart and that dude too. You also are a "batu api" which is a dumbass decision.
