mobchitooo
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im too tired and in pain to respond to anyone and i hope i bleed out bye
Ikilledabug6578
@mobchitooo No, don't give up yet. The longest fights prompt the biggest reward. To give up is to miss out on the plan set for YOU it's destiny. And now is not your time. Live a little longer and I promise things will change. I'll be there with you to witness it.
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mobchitooo
im too tired and in pain to respond to anyone and i hope i bleed out bye
Ikilledabug6578
@mobchitooo No, don't give up yet. The longest fights prompt the biggest reward. To give up is to miss out on the plan set for YOU it's destiny. And now is not your time. Live a little longer and I promise things will change. I'll be there with you to witness it.
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mobchitooo
this message may be offensive
"u can vent to me" listen i DONT want to vent. I want people to actually talk to me and make me feel like they genuinely want me around, is tht too much to ask for? Im so tired of watching people receive the comfort, attention AND affection i've been wishing for. im tired of seeing people have friends who write them paragraphs and make them feel loved while im literally just here wondering what the fuck is so wrong with me that i cant seem to have that too. and no im not happy for them. im jealous, im bitter and resentful and i admit it. i see people having the exact friendships i always wanted and it hurts, i dont care about being the bigger person, im tired of having to constantly swallow my feelings and act like everything is fine when it clearly isn't, and it's clear to you too you just dont give a shit. i've spent SO MUCH TIME feeling ignored and replaceable that sometimes i genuinely wonder what its like to be someone's first choice. it's true i dont need constant attention every second of the day and i dont want everyone to adore me, i just want to feel like i matter to someone, and no, saying "OH BUT YOU DO MATTER TO ME!!!" and then disappearing doesn't fix shit, you're just making me feel like trash again. i've NEVER had consistent comfort. Not even from online friends. do you understand how lonely that feels? even online where I THOUGHT i might finally find people who understand me i still end up feeling like im standing outside looking in. and then people wonder why the fuck im jealous, WHY WOULDNT I BE? im watching other people experience something i've been missing for so long and im expected to be happy for them while pretending it doesnt make me feel even more alone. yeah sure jealousy isn't pretty and i know bitterness isnt an attractive quality but im tired of having to make my pain palatable for everyone else. i dont want to have to break down just to feel like someone gives a shit about me.
InosukeSenpai1
this message may be
offensive
@mobchitooo I'm sorry...... I keep forgetting and ik that isn't an excuse..... I'm so fucking sry..... you do deserve to be treated like a real person...... and the same thing still kind of is happening to me.... I'm sorry...
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Ikilledabug6578
@mobchitooo i wish you knew that there is nothing wrong with you for wanting to be loved in a way that you can actually feel. you deserve friendships where you don't have to beg for attention, question your place in someone's life, or wonder whether people genuinely want you around. i understand why you're jealous, and i don't think you're a bad person for feeling that way. you're watching other people receive the very things you've been longing for, and of course that hurts. you shouldn't have to reach your breaking point just for someone to notice that you're struggling, and you shouldn't have to make your pain smaller just to make other people comfortable. you deserve to be checked on, thought of, appreciated, and loved without having to ask for it every single time. you deserve people who make an effort to include you, who choose to talk to you because they genuinely enjoy your presence, and who show you through their actions that you matter to them. please don't mistake the way people have treated you for a reflection of your worth. being overlooked doesn't mean you're forgettable, and feeling replaceable doesn't mean you're someone who can be replaced. i know words alone can't fix the loneliness you've been carrying, but i hope you eventually find the kind of friendships where you don't have to question whether you're wanted, because the people around you will make it clear. you deserve that kind of love, too. not because you've earned it by suffering, but because you're a person who deserves to feel cared for, just like everyone else. I'm sorry you feel neglected
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mobchitooo
im leaving
Ashi_Flower
@mobchitooo if you wish to leave, I wont force you to stay. I just hope you'll do alright man.
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B4D_L1TTL3_B1TCH
@mobchitooo I'm not going to stop you, cuz if that's what you need its what you need. But please stay safe, and if you come back please let us know but you're okay
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mobchitooo
"omg we care" yeah no if u did you'd show it but anyways
B4D_L1TTL3_B1TCH
@mobchitooo I know I'm not here a lot, and I would never really been close, but I am here for you. I care about problems of every victim, problems of every single human being. I care about every survivor, every woman, every queer person, every person of color. I care about people. No matter how often I'm around them, or if I don't talk to them a lot. I do care about you, I just don't have a lot of time to show it
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itsjoyceblevins
@mobchitooo *hugs* If we didn't care, we wouldn't be here, supporting you through thick and thin. Don't EVER think you're not worthy of love, okay?
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mobchitooo
Froggydude's starting to grow on me I like his content
mobchitooo
I wisj I could be nurturing
mobchitooo
Why's my battery draining so fast hello
mobchitooo
I CANFT MLVE
mobchitooo
My wrists are in so much pain, I cant pass out because I'm in school
elle_is_a_muffin
@mobchitooo oh twin the same thing is happening to me but on my thigh please stay safe mob I don’t want you to be in pain
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mobchitooo
@elle_is_a_muffin no but they're recent and i haven't covered them so my clothes keep rubbing against them and it stings
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